Archive for the 'Food, Drink, and Dancing Girls' Category

I Had This Great Idea for a Web 2.0 Site

Sunday, August 31st, 2008

Alas, I was beat to it, quite soundly I might add.

The site rocks. Hit the big play button.

MixwitMixwit make a mixtapeMixwit mixtapes

OK, blog still dead.

I should be after the DNC RMBB 5000.

But I live on!

Back to what you were doing.

You Will Be Hearing of Drinks and Rumors of Drunks

Tuesday, April 29th, 2008

I think I might have used that line, or something like it, previously when mentioning an upcoming Rocky Mountain Blogger Bash.

Regardless, I am using it again. It’s. Just. That. Good*.

So, Zomby and I were planning to meet up to discuss the next RMBB, but got interrupted by an email from someone who had some interesting ideas. We’re meeting with them this week to discuss. It could be pretty cool.

Stay tuned.

* And if it doesn’t make sense to you, you’re either not a very good Christian or you’re an atheist who really needs to read the source material.

Creative Headline of the Day

Tuesday, April 8th, 2008

Thieves Pilfer $24,000 Worth Of Beer In Wis.

Talk about a beer binge: Authorities are searching for three men who stole about $24,000 worth of beer from a trucking company south of Milwaukee…

They were trying to hook a trailer full of Miller Brewing Co. beer to the tractors when they were interrupted. The men then fled, taking a different tractor-trailer rig full of Miller beer, and a semi tractor with no load.


I thought the headline said they stole beer.

We shouldn’t seek to punish these men; we should reward them for sparing that nasty brewer’s spew from being inflicted upon the population.

All Things Spam

Saturday, April 5th, 2008

This is very odd.

Go on, ask the Book of Spam a question.

My Left Arm Feels Tingly

Tuesday, April 1st, 2008

That’s my favorite line from a Bud Light Real Men of Genius radio spot.

Please, please, please… for the love of all the gods, imaginary or otherwise, do not take this to mean I endorse drinking that stuff.


(found via Innocent Bystanders)

Your Heart Will Thank You

Monday, March 10th, 2008

Your liver, maybe not so much:

Middle-aged non-drinkers can quickly reduce their risk of heart disease by introducing a daily tipple to their diet, South Carolina researchers say.

New moderate drinkers were 38% less likely to develop heart disease than those who stayed tee-total, a four-year study involving 7,500 people found.

Those who drank only wine showed the most benefit, the researchers reported in the American Medical Journal.

Does this mean, as Benjamin Franklin once said, that the making of wine is “a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy?” If so, does that mean he really doesn’t like Southern Baptists, Mormons, and Seventh Day Adventists?

I guess we know who won’t be getting invited to the Heavenly kegger. Won’t they be surprised?

Boy, how I am going to laugh and laugh and laugh at them from my place in Hell reserved for atheists.

Not to Be a Total Dork, But…

Tuesday, March 4th, 2008

Gary Gygax has died.

If you know who he is without Googling, you were probably a bit of a dork at one time in your life.

If you don’t know, you’re probably better off just moving along. Nothing to see here.

Please Note: I have so had sex before.

And not just with myself.

Thank you very much.

Update: Wow, reading some of the eulogies in various comments around the blogosphere, might I suggest that some of you current dorks realize that (a) it’s just a game and that (b) women are really better than any game?

Update 2: My credentials – D&D Basic, AD&D, Top Secret, TMNT, Twilight 2000, Marvel Superheroes, DC Heroes, Cyberpunk, and an assortment of GURPS.

How Lindsay Got Her Boobs Back

Monday, February 18th, 2008

Well, hello there, ladies*.

Hey, I say do whatever it takes to revive a career derailed by alcohol, drugs, and being a 24-7 party girl.

Especially if “whatever” involves Lindsay Lohan and some degree of (post-stick-figure) nudey-tationosity.

* Probably not safe for work. Or church, for that matter. But at home, alone? Oh yeah, brother. Oh. Yeah.

She’s Got Her Priorities in Order

Wednesday, February 6th, 2008

Safety first!

FLORIDA – Police say a woman accused of drunk driving had a case of beer buckled up safely, and a one-year-old girl sitting in the back seat without a seat belt or car seat.

Hey, look, just last night the handle on my 12-pack of Redhook ESB ripped and – even though it only dropped about a foot – two bottles broke, leaking their beer cheer all over the garage floor*.

Now, I’ve also managed to drop the kids while playing from more than a foot, and they bound right up and keep on going.

Kids: resilient.

Beer: not so much.

Set that woman free!**

* It’s frozen there now. Perhaps I could scrape it into a glass and let it thaw. Yum!

** Or shoot her. Either way.

Happy 2008!

Tuesday, January 1st, 2008

We’re all that much closer to the grave.