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A Pointless Post
Shuttle survivors!
Time Waster #920,003
A Wish Comes True - Sort Of
Something Like That
Barbara's Bush
Just wait until the fools at PETA get their hooks into this headline...
You Don't Say!
Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!
World Wide Runt Update

« March 2003 | Main | May 2003 »

April 30, 2003

A Pointless Post

Yes, just like all the others.

Just wanted to take a moment to say that U2's The Joshua Tree is one of the finest albums ever recorded. I, finally, sixteen years after its release, own it on CD, and without the benefit of Kazaa.

Ah, the glory days when U2 didn't suck eggs.

Moving along.

This post can also be found here and here. One by one, the blogosphere is mine. Or something.

Posted by Andy at 08:48 PM | Comments (10) | TrackBack (1)

Shuttle survivors!

AP: Live worms from Columbia experiments found in shuttle wreckage

Hundreds of worms being used in a science experiment aboard the space shuttle Columbia have been found alive in the wreckage, NASA said today.

The worms, known as C. elegans, were found in debris found in Texas several weeks ago. Technicians sorting through the debris at Kennedy Space Center in Florida didn't open the containers of worms and dead moss cells until this week.

All seven astronauts were killed when the shuttle disintegrated over Texas on Feb. 1. Columbia contained almost 60 scientific investigations.

"To my knowledge, these are the only live experiments that have been located and identified," said Bruce Buckingham, a NASA spokesman at the Kennedy Space Center.

And they can always reunite them with their crew...

Posted by at 04:55 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Time Waster #920,003

Why not go and play 20 Questions for a while? You can skip right over the demographic part if you so choose by clicking on "play."

Mindless fun - have to love it.

Posted by Andy at 12:17 PM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (1)

A Wish Comes True - Sort Of

In his most recent essay, Bill Whittle ended with the following:

And I have one final wish, which I know seems very unlikely, but which I will share anyway.

I fervently hope that someday, perhaps decades from now, Iraq will have a really top-notch soccer team. I hope that one day, they will get to the final round of the World Cup, and when they do, I hope it is Team USA they play for the championship.

I hope that the Americans play a tough, aggressive, masterful game, that they use all of the speed and skill and power at their command. And then I want to sit there watching TV as an old man, and watch the faces on the Iraqi people when the game is over, because I want to see that the most relieved and joyous they can conceive of being, is the day that tiny Iraq got out on that soccer field and kicked our ass.

Well, Bill, if this is any indication, you might get your wish:
NAJAF, Iraq (Reuters) -- U.S. Marines may consider themselves an elite fighting force, but they were no match for an Iraqi soccer side who thrashed them 7-0 in the southern town of Najaf.

Posted by Andy at 09:20 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Something Like That

Which Founding Father Are You?

Link found via Zachary B.

Posted by Andy at 08:54 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Barbara's Bush

If the underage drinking wasn't enough to make her dad feel a little red in the face, perhaps this will help:

Hustler magazine publisher Larry Flynt is hunting for a videotape rumoured to show first daughter Barbara Bush in the nude, reports The New York Post.

Flynt's cohorts are scouring the New Haven, Connecticut, campus of Yale University, where Barbara, 21, is a student, in hopes of buying a video supposedly made at one of Yale's notorious "naked parties."

Apparently "good judgement" is not a trait that runs very strongly in the First Twins.

Posted by Andy at 08:38 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0)

Just wait until the fools at PETA get their hooks into this headline...

REUTERS: Fish Do Feel Pain, Say British Scientists

Of course they do. Otherwise my Chinese Fish Torture technique of extracting information from haddock wouldn't work so well...

Anglers take note -- British scientists say that after years of debate, they now have proof that fish feel pain.

Animal activists are on the warpath after a study released on Wednesday showed how rainbow trout react to discomfort. They condemned fishing as cruel and demanded an end to the sport -- but anglers themselves dismissed the study.

The research found that fish have receptors in their heads and that subjecting them to noxious substances causes "adverse behavioral and physiological changes." "This fulfils the criteria for animal pain," said Dr Lynne Sneddon who headed the research, published on Wednesday by the Royal Society, Britain's national academy of science.

Bee venom or acetic acid was injected into the lips of some of the trout, while control groups of fish were injected with saline solution or merely handled. The trout injected with venom or acid began to show "rocking" motion -- similar to that seen in stressed higher vertebrates -- and those injected with acetic acid began rubbing their lips in the gravel of their tank.

"These do not appear to be reflex responses," Sneddon said.

So when you hook a fish, remember that you're causing it pain. Be sure to reel it in quickly and whack it with a lead weight to minimize that pain. Gut, fillet, and fry with butter and lemon.

Posted by at 07:47 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

You Don't Say!

Your tax dollars hard at work:

Internet users skeptical of junk e-mails promising easy money, miracle cures and dream dates are right to be wary: The government says two-thirds of the "spam" messages clogging online mailboxes probably are false in some way.
I'd never have guessed!
"In one way or another, a great deal of it appears to contain important information that is false or deceptive," said Eileen Harrington, the FTC's director of marketing practices.
Ms. Harrington went on to say that the Sun rises in the East and sets in the West.


Posted by Andy at 07:08 AM | Comments (12) | TrackBack (0)

April 29, 2003

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Jack Osbourne, son of Ozzie and Sharon Osbourne (heads of a family people used to give a damn about for some inexplicable reason) and sister of international rock icon Kelly Osbourne (and as memory serves the ex-husband of Lisa Marie Presley Keogh Jackson Coppola), is currently in rehab. This comes as an extreme shock to... uh... no one, or as Willie Wonka once observed:

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 06:04 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (1)

World Wide Runt Update

It's official - the WWRunt will be entering the world this Friday, sometime after 10:30am. Still being a stubborn breech baby, the c-section is a go-ahead.

I suspect my blogging will be intermittent at best in the days following, and probably all focused on dirty diapers, spit-up, and the like. Lileks has some competition!

OK, maybe not.

Either way, the sheer terror and immense joy of impending fatherhood have bubbled to the surface. Yikes.

Posted by Andy at 11:35 AM | Comments (13) | TrackBack (1)

A garbageheap by any other name...

Let's see what's happening in Israel this morning:

JERUSALEM POST: Abu Mazen tells terrorists to lay down weapons

So, what did the terrorists do?

REUTERS: Palestinian Militants Say They Won't Disarm

No, Reuters, we want to know what the terrorists are going to do, not these so-called militants that you speak of.

Posted by at 08:08 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Fair, Balanced - Part 4

I think this Iraqi quote speaks for itself. Too funny:

His friend, Abbas Ali, concurs. "We used to go to sleep at 10 p.m. Now we stay up until 4 or 5 a.m. because we can't get enough." Still desperate for war news, they tune to CNN, BBC, and what appears to be a local favorite, Fox. They like it, people here say, because it has been the most supportive of the war.
And, no, it's not from Fox either.

(found at Instapundit, of course)

Posted by Andy at 07:35 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (1)

April 28, 2003

Animal Instinct

A quick one before bed.

I just went to the master bedroom to get ready for bed, when - at 10:30pm on a Monday night - I came across my wife standing in the shower scrubbing away any and all traces of soap scum. Mind you, she's cleaned the shower before, but not with as much energy and determination as I witnessed mere moments ago - even more strange considering her energy was pretty well sapped but two hours ago.

Ah, the miracle of nesting.

I should have seen it coming sooner, I suppose. She's been lamenting the sorry state of some of our bath towels for the first time in six years. She's continually making adjustments to the collection of items she has packed for the hospital. She's folded and organized every piece of clothing and hardware in the nursery. She even cleaned the inside of the microwave this evening without a bit of encouragement from me.*

If only I could bottle this urge without having to go through the whole pregnancy thing, I'd be rich. Or at least living in a spotless house.

It's almost scary. Good thing this is all almost over (aside from the 18-21 years of dependence to follow).

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 10:49 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Say Anything

OK, I'm bored, but if you want to know some trivia about one of the best movies ever made, then check out this. And if you don't, or if you disagree, that's fine. I mean, you're wrong, but it's fine.

Posted by Andy at 10:07 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

I'm Shocked, Shocked I Say!

I'm an Atheist!

Which Enemy of the Christian Church Are You?

Take More of Robert & Tim's Quizzes
Watch Robert & Tim's Cartoons

Thanks to Zuly for the pointer to this.

Posted by Andy at 08:49 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

No Smoking, Maybe

Mayor Webb continues his fight against the rights of property owners with a proposed smoking ban in Denver:

"The issue is very simple," Webb said during a news conference on the steps of the Denver City and County Building. "It's about life and death. It's about quality of life. It's a health issue."

"If a person goes in a restaurant and wants to be free of second-hand smoke, they should be able to do that," he added.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 07:09 PM | Comments (21) | TrackBack (0)

Online Music Solution?

Apple has come up with a model for online music distribution that even has the five major labels on-board.

The service announced Monday removes several limitations that have so far reduced legitimate online music distribution to a small niche in the entertainment industry.

For example, consumers can buy songs and keep them for as long as they want, share playlists on up to three Macintosh computers, and transfer them to any number of portable iPods so they can hear their music on the road. No subscriptions are necessary, and buyers can burn unlimited copies of the songs onto CDs.

"It's not free, but it's 99 cents a song, pretty doggone close," Apple CEO Steve Jobs said. "There's no legal alternative that's worth beans."

At first glance, it sounds like a pretty good plan to me - I'd be happy to pay 99 cents a song, with one caveat: they should make low quality MP3s available for auditioning of music before purchase. If I download a song and it sucks, I'm still out nearly a buck (and that can feed 400 children for a week in socialist fantasyland) - so some kind of pre-purchase listening is a must.

You know, if you're reading this, Mr. Jobs.

Posted by Andy at 05:56 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

When love affairs go sour

REUTERS: Palestinian Love Affair with Saddam Sours

Know what fixes things right up with your bitches, Saddam? Try 1-800-FLOWERS. They can then fill the vases with flaming gasoline to throw at tanks and use the flowers for the funerals.

Posted by at 02:34 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (1)

bring home da bacon, or at least da pork


When I first heard about Netflix (which I give two enthusiastic thumbs up too, btw) I wondered how long it would be before somebody would link the whole "DVDs at home" theme to "nekkid people gettin' it on". It's here now, in case you're wondering, whether you're gay or straight.


Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 11:41 AM | Comments (35) | TrackBack (0)

First Winona, now what's-her-name

I concede that shoplifting is bad and celebrities should be prosecuted like everybody else, but is it really fair to require $20,000 in bail for $400 in (allegedly) stolen items?

Posted by Jon at 11:14 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

The Last Word

Poor, widdle Rev is upset about my changing his comments here. How do I know? Oh, simply because he's whining about it in an e-mail to me and a couple other bloggers (and he calls me whiny? Look in the mirror, pumpkin).

So, here's the last word on it, Rev. Actually, two of them. Tough shit. You've been warned countless times to cool it with the vitriol - and each time, you have refused. You have only yourself to blame, so get over it.

You think I'm oppressing you because you disagree with me? God, you sound like the Dixie Chicks or Martin Sheen. One need only look around to see that I don't mind disagreement - what I do mind (and you know this already) is, well, you. You, as a human being, entirely separate from any arguments you may care to make. I. Don't. Like. You.

And, trust me, I'm not alone in that sentiment.

Got it? Good.

You want me to be accountable for changing your comments? Uh, I admitted to it right in the comments thread. There was nothing secretive about it. You're literate, right? Or are you really just a room full of monkeys who get lucky when writing screeds?

Nevermind, I don't want to know - I still won't like you, regardless. Have a nice day!

Oh, and be sure to visit his site in the coming days! He's threatening to use that poor, armless Iraqi boy's story in order to mock me - and he says we're the ones who exploit the boy? Yeah, right!

We regret the loss of innocent life - and he uses it for laughter. That's the sign of a sick, sad, little man, no? Someone should send him a kitten.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 10:55 AM | TrackBack (1)

Let the Wookie win

HOLLYWOOD REPORTER: 'Star Wars' faves back for 'Episode III'

Peter Mayhew, aka "Chewbacca," will be back for Episode 3 of the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy.

I guess that means he has to stop shaving as of... ten years ago?

Posted by at 09:19 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

April 27, 2003

Scary Stuff

NSYNC is bad.

Fan fiction is worse.

NSYNC fan fiction is beyond our worst nightmares.

Hold us, mommy.

Posted by Andy at 09:21 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

"Religion Is A Dangerous Thing"

It takes a pretty big set of balls to say something like this in print. And an even bigger set when you're in the South.

Good work, Ed.

Posted by Andy at 06:24 PM | Comments (18) | TrackBack (5)

A Tale of Two Leaders

We get strategery, and the Brits get this.

Science and progress

By Tony Blair

London: The last century was one of remarkable scientific achievement. But perhaps no single breakthrough will have a greater impact than the discovery 50 years ago today of the structure of deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA), the molecule of life. It laid the foundation for modern bioscience and opened the door to many of the stunning advances we are now seeing in medicine and pharmaceuticals, and in plant and animal sciences.

There's more.

No wonder Vicky has got such a thing for Mr. Blair.

Posted by Andy at 06:00 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

In the end, he may or may not be mayor.

What would your local police do if you were to proclaim yourself and your cronies as (unelected) mayor of your neighborhood? Of course, you probably live in America, where you'd be locked up for a bit and sent off for psychiatric examination.

Let's see how Baghdad, Looterland does things with America in the mix:

AP: U.S. Seizes Self-Proclaimed Baghdad Mayor

An Iraqi exile who had proclaimed himself Baghdad's mayor and begun issuing directives to city workers was arrested Sunday by U.S. forces, who accused him of exerting authority he didn't have.

Mohammed Mohsen al-Zubaidi was arrested at 5 p.m. in downtown Baghdad "for his inability to support the coalition military authority and for exercising authority which was not his," U.S. military spokesman Capt. David Connolly said in Baghdad. Soldiers arrested seven others found with al-Zubaidi, Connolly said without identifying them. He said he was unsure where the men were taken but indicated they were in U.S. custody.

We're the civilizin' factor.

Now riddle me this. What if we, the Coalition, hadn't been there?

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by at 11:58 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

The Ties That Bind

Hmmm, interesting:

LONDON (AP) -- Documents discovered in the bombed out headquarters of Iraq's intelligence service provide evidence of a direct link between Saddam Hussein's regime and Osama bin Laden's al Qaeda terrorist network, a newspaper reported Sunday.
We shall see. Just sayin' is all.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 12:35 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Naked for the WWR

Yes, this is much better. We always knew those Dixie Chicks fancied us.

Posted by Andy at 12:05 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

April 26, 2003

Hardee's or Stiffy's?

Didn't these people see Lethal Weapon 3 where Joe Pesci said "They really f*** you in the drive-through?" I guess they were tired of getting just a few of those small ketchup packets.

NEWS24: Sex on the Menu

An elderly couple have been arrested in the US for allegedly performing a sex act in a booth at a fast food restaurant. The 70-year-old man and 59-year-old woman have also been banned from Hardee's restaurant in New Philadelphia.

Police charged both with public indecency after receiving complaints from restaurant employees and a customer. Traffic Officer Shawn Nelson told the Times Reporter that police had received previous reports about the same two people allegedly performing lurid acts in the parking lot, or inside the restaurant.

However, he said, this was the first time they had still been at the restaurant by the time officers arrived.

Here's a few altered fast food slogans for you to ponder

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by at 03:27 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (1)

How Many Candles?

Apparently, it is Stephen Green's birthday.

Happy birthday!

Posted by Andy at 02:55 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

April 25, 2003

I've Had Enough

We have been more than patient with Reverend Mykeru. We've overtly extended the hand of friendship...only to have it repeatedly bitten. We've explained our positions at excruciating length and in extensive detail, repeatedly emphasizing that simply because we think the war with Iraq was justified (it was,) that we don't necessarily believe in other aspects of the Bush White House's agenda. Total Information Awareness, the Halliburton "uncontracts," John Ashcroft's appointment to attorney general, etc. The list goes on and on.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Tom at 03:10 PM | Comments (15) | TrackBack (0)

How can it be immoral when she dates an Angel?

Now that AIDS and cancer and school shootings are solved, we can finally take on this problem. I think it's disgusting that pop-culture would attempt to make a mockery of Christianity when LaHaye and Jenkins are already doing a better job of it than UPN ever could.

Posted by Jon at 01:55 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Why Iraq?

This is an interesting read. Not really surprising to me, having read Woodward's Bush At War, but for those who haven't read it, the article in question is a good introduction to why we pushed Iraq toward war.

This was the day that changed everything about American foreign policy. It was also the day I stopped being a multi-lateralist in favor of hugs and bunnies to ease the world's woe.

I agree with using American power to intimidate terrorist-sponsoring states and to spread the seeds of democratic thought. Obviously no one else is doing it.

If you don't agree, that's fine. I honestly don't care.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 11:08 AM | Comments (12) | TrackBack (1)

Nickel and Timing

CNN: Brother can you spare a (new) nickel? - It won't be wooden and it still won't be all nickel, but the 5-cent piece soon will have a new look.

Here's what pisses me off:

How does the nickel compare? The U.S. Mint issued approximately 1.2 billion new nickels last year. Designed to last for well over one hundred years, nickels are usually taken out of circulation every thirty years.

It's worth five goddamned cents, we make 1.2 billion of them a year, and it lasts a hundred years.

By comparison, I bought a limited-edition $200 American-made bread machine a while back and it barely lasted two years. The custom bonding on my incisors sets my insurance back a grand, can't be bleached white, and it has to be replaced every four years until I push up the daisies or decide that gumming my gumbo is a good idea. Heck, my never-recalled $10,000 Ringed Planet Cult of Rural Tennessee plastic-and-glass car lasted five until I traded it in for a Nazimobile piece of crap. And the fresh pothole I ran over last October that bent one of the rims had just been filled in by Mayor Lee P. "Out Of Town Brown's" henchturds in orange reflective vests the week before.

I think the people who design the nickel need to start designing everything else in this country.

Posted by at 10:36 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (1)

An Amish Oversight

Whoops, don't know how I missed this. Laurence has a way with the English language, no?

Posted by Andy at 10:10 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)


In a brilliant flash of genius designed to continually reinforce the notion that PETA is full of wackos, Ingrid Newkirk (the President of the organization) has developed this plan:

The leader of a prominent U.S.-based animal rights group said she had drawn up a will directing that her flesh be barbecued and her skin used to make leather products in protest at man's ill-treatment of animals.
Ingrid, darling, if you happen to end up as a jacket, I wear a Large. And I'm sure my wife would love a new handbag. Oh, and a wallet for me as well.

Just think, everytime I remove it to give money* to organizations that aren't complete lunatics, I'll remember you, and PETA, and how you're all obviously crazy.

* Heh, that's a lie, everyone knows that "people like me" don't give money to others. It's all part of being a pathetic excuse for a human being.

Posted by Andy at 08:26 AM | Comments (31) | TrackBack (1)

Webb's Web of Lies?

There's a bit of a brouhaha in Denver regarding a recent increase in parking meter fees and fines. And a bit of a disconnect in the city government's rationale for the changes:

City officials say they raised prices and increased the hours for meters because Denver needs the money. They also want the meter policies to encourage people to do more short-term parking downtown, opening up more spaces for more shoppers.

"There are more spaces open. It makes the city more accessible," said Anderson Moore, acting director of parking management.

Of course, Denver needs more money - and in typical government fashion, rather than seek ways to cut their own costs, to operate more efficiently - that is, to live by the rules that businesses live by - it decides to just demand more of our money.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 07:53 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (0)

April 24, 2003

Morms, Norms, and the Sanctimonius Santorum

We might be child-bride taking, child abusing ignorant desert dwelling white-trash, but we have feelings!

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 05:00 PM | Comments (24) | TrackBack (0)

And Now, The Mouse News

REUTERS: Study Looks at Contraceptive, Herpes Risk in Mice

New research in mice suggests that women who use the injectable contraceptive Depo-Provera may have a higher risk of infection with genital herpes than non-users. Normally, mice will only develop genital herpes if they are exposed to extremely high concentrations of the virus that causes the condition.

However, researchers at McMaster University in Canada discovered that mice that received Depo-Provera were 100 times more susceptible to infection with herpes simplex virus type 2 (HSV-2) than untreated mice were.

I guess it's back to putting tiny condoms on all my mice when they want to have sex.

Posted by at 03:02 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

The Debate Continues...Sort Of

Caitlin Hall, a columnist for the Daily Wildcat of the University of Arizona, lays waste to the deceit of the likes of creationist Dwayne Gish and the Calvary Chapel of Tucson.

Ah, kids today. Gotta love'em.

Posted by Andy at 12:51 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

An Astute Observation

By now, we've all heard of this charming provision of the Patriot Act:

The threat, according to booksellers and librarians, comes from the federal government and a provision of the USA Patriot Act in Section 215 that authorizes the FBI to obtain "certain business records" based on warrants from secret Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act courts, which under changes instituted by USA Patriot do not require that the government show probable cause.

The law, passed by Congress less than two months after the terror attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, also makes it illegal for a business — including libraries or bookstores — whose client records are demanded to tell anyone about it, even the person whose purchase or borrowing records are demanded.

And, we're probably all aware of the efforts afoot to make the Patriot Act a permanent piece of legislation, removing the sunset clauses that were put in as assurances to our long-term civil liberties.

So what do we do about it?

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 09:43 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

Talk about musical theatre for guys who don't like musical theatre...

Let's see Andrew Lloyd Webber top this.

Maybe next, the "Lovely Ladies" number from Les Mis will go interactive.

It'll be interesting in a few years when this has run the circuit and is being done in Florida dinner theaters. I can imagine the retired actuary now: "Could you hurry this up, hot lips- I wanna get back to the buffet before the Jambalaya's all gone..."

Posted by Jon at 09:04 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

April 23, 2003

Requiem for a Lunatic

Twixt a family emergency, an exceptionally busy period at work (final projects/exams), and moving to a new apartment, my posting has lagged a bit, but I’ll post this quite humorless and largely purposeless piece as my volley to a fallen--- acquaintance of note. Don’t read beyond this if you’re looking for fluff, depth, or a point.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 12:10 PM | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0)


Life imitating art.

Posted by Andy at 10:27 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

There's Always the Write-In

Too funny - today's news from my former home, Alabama:

MONTGOMERY, Alabama (AP) -- Unless Alabama's election law is changed, there could be one notable candidate missing from the state's 2004 presidential election ballot -- President Bush.

The problem is that the Republican National Convention is being held later than usual to avoid conflict with the Olympics, and the GOP won't choose a candidate until September 2 -- two days after Alabama's August 31 deadline to certify presidential contenders.


Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 10:08 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Can't stop the music

REUTERS: 50,000 Pirated CDs Crushed with Steamroller

What do you run over with a steamroller when music is digitally pirated?

Posted by at 09:19 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

She's Having Your Baby

Well, not yours, but Dawn has a bun in the oven courtesy of Eric. Congratulations!

And today is the day that we try the external cephalic version on the World Wide Runt, who is still being stubborn like its father and refusing to turn head down. I hear it's not a very comfortable experience for mother or baby - I've definitely got the easy part.

It has about a 60% success rate in turning breech babies. Possible complications include putting her into labor or putting the baby into fetal distress - if that happens, we're probably off to an emergency C-section and I could be a father by late afternoon. However, the chance of that is small.

If it turns successfully, then we'll wait for nature to run its course in the next couple of weeks - and if it doesn't turn, well, we'll be pulling out the calendar and picking its birthday via C-section.

I didn't think it was supposed to be this stressful. Ah well, whatcha gonna do?

(and thanks to Jo for the heads-up on Dawn)

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 08:09 AM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (0)

My What Big Feet I Have

Well, my ecological footprint anyway.

If everyone lived like I do, we would need 6.4 planet Earths to support them. Well, the Earth is such a beautiful blue ball hanging in space, I can't see anything wrong with adding another 5.4 of them.

(courtesy of Lileks, who also points out the flaws in this little calculation)

Posted by Andy at 07:23 AM | Comments (18) | TrackBack (1)

April 22, 2003

We've Got the Cure

If all the well-wishes from the blogosphere don't bring Vicky back to our midsts, then surely this will. No one, and I repeat no one (except the cruelest of hearts, probably belonging to some far-left or far-right kook), can resist the love that is the wombat:

C'mon sing along...
We've got a thing that's called Wombat Love
We've got a hole in the earth, Wombat Love
OK, fine, maybe not - shut the hell up.

Posted by Andy at 10:30 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (1)

A Bad Choice

You know, sometimes I think it's best to plead "not guilty by reason of insanity" - but maybe that's me.

Or maybe in Texas it's perfectly normal to make the beast with two backs while the body of your decapitated child is at the foot of the bed.

Call me old fashioned.

Posted by Andy at 09:42 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Show these doorman-dorks the door!

REUTERS: N.Y. doormen threaten strike - Workers could walk after midnight Tuesday

Oh, like this labor dispute is going to send the economy into a tailspin. It matters just as much as my worry that the stuffed teddy bears I get my wife for Valentine's Day need to get regular dental checkups and colonoscopies by licensed faux-veterinarians.

The fact that these ornamental humans have a union makes me wonder if the putrescent international stupidity oozing from the hellhole on the East Side known as the United Nations is bleeding into the soil and affecting future generations of landed gentry and their manservants.

Hail your own cabs, carry your own packages, score your own blow, and open your own goddamned doors, people. If anybody outside of New York gives two shits about this situation, may Osama smack Boeings into every building in Manhattan and fart anthrax spores on the rubble.

Oh, and God Bless America.

Posted by at 02:11 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (3)

DIY Funtime

Why buy a set of the Iraqi leadership cards when you can print your own, courtesy of CBS?

Posted by Andy at 10:39 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Don't You Hate These Quizzes?

Yeah, me too. Oh well.

Mean lil fellow, arn't you?

What Monty Python Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Go on, you're curious who you are - take the quiz - leave it in the comments or Trackback to it. Or don't. Being a killer rabbit, it really doesn't matter to me.

(found via Instapundit, so you've probably already seen it anyway)

Posted by Andy at 08:45 AM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (5)

In The Dark

The High Priestess of Soul, Nina Simone died yesterday at the age of 70.

Pardon me while I go listen to "I Want a Little Sugar in My Bowl" repeatedly.

Posted by Tom at 12:22 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

April 21, 2003

Where, Where...

...the hell is Vicky? Well maybe she went to get a sideways haircut. Maybe she went to get a striped shirt.

No, unfortunately, she had a run in with an over-eager Rotty.

If you get a chance, stop by Matt's and send your well wishes to his most excellent wife.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 10:06 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Southwest must be doing something right

Right after the hijacking of the planes on 9/11, every pundit and expert screamed "Why don't we do what El-Al does for security?"

So now that American is trying to sneak in retention bonuses for its executives out of government handouts circling the bowl and United has already gone down the tubes, why aren't the same pundits and experts screaming "Why don't we do what Southwest does for business practices?"

REUTERS: Southwest Air Profit Bucks Industry Trend

Southwest Airlines Co. on Monday posted a slim first-quarter profit, using low costs and low fares to outpace large U.S. rivals that have reported huge losses.

Southwest, the No. 6 U.S. airline, said it expects a second-quarter profit as well barring another major industry shock, though it will be hard to match year-earlier results because the Iraq war has disrupted second-quarter bookings.

"Although our financial performance has been exceptional relative to the airline industry as a whole, Southwest, too, has been severely impacted by the lingering effects of the 2001 terrorist attacks and the war in Iraq," Chief Executive James Parker said in a statement.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by at 09:23 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (3)

A New Title

Seattle, the early 90s world headquarters for grunge, will soon be the world headquarters for geeks.

Good news, ladies - the ratio of men to women is about to increase. Well, it's good news if you like guys that live with their mom and dad and that can speak Klingon fluently.

Posted by Andy at 07:48 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

April 20, 2003

A Boy and His Toys

So, I found a new toy to rival my Hoover steam cleaner - honestly, you'd be amazed how much dirt and gunk is hiding in your carpet until you clean it with one of those. Positively disgusting - brings out the boy in me.

Anyway, today, while cleaning up my office, I remembered a friend had given us a shredder a while back that she longer needed - so I dug it out, plopped it on top of the kitchen bin, and got to the business of shredding a ton of old financial documents I'd been waiting to be rid of.

So, here I sit a couple hours later, with four, large kitchen bags full of shredded documents. I'd make Enron proud, I would - any other corrupt corporations need my services? Just holler.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 04:47 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

America's pastime meets Ameritech's weekend minutes plan

The fans these days are getting rowdier and rowdier. It used to be that they'd throw beers or peanut shells at opposing team's outfielders. Heck, I once covered drug-sponge Darryl Strawberry with a three-dollar Coke.

But pegging a man in the back of the head with a cell phone?

It's time for me to put on my bottle thick glasses and do my best Harry Caray imitation!

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by at 02:43 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (2)

Shock and Awe

Surprise, surprise, but the Iraqis can't believe their eyes:

Iraqis always knew the Saddam family lived well, even as it claimed U.N. sanctions were starving its people and denying its children lifesaving medicine. But few realized just how well they lived.
But that's ok, because sanctions were working.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 01:02 PM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (0)

No Sign of Rain

Today's looking to be a repeat of yesterday on the blogging front. Lots to do to get ready for the World Wide Runt (you know, like club a baby seal and have it stuffed as a cuddly plush toy for my future "conservative"). Perhaps Tom, or Jon, or Laurence will chime in with something for your entertainment dollar (speaking of dollars, look to your left...).

Had a good afternoon up in Fort Collins yesterday. The weather sucked all around, but RoverP introduced me to some local food, we played some Xbox, threw the Frisbee a bit, and drank beer. Mmmm, beer.

I'm rather enjoying this concept of not posting anything significant on the weekends. Maybe RoverP is on to something.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 09:00 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (1)

April 19, 2003

The Drought Continues

The forecast calls for light to non-existent posting once again today, as I am headed up to Fort Collins to hang out with RoverPundit. We'll probably spend the day looking for ways to crush the poor, destroy the environment, and overturn Roe v. Wade, because that's what we "conservatives" do in our spare time, don't you know?

Have a great day.

Posted by Andy at 10:12 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Here It Comes

Contemplating some ideas for a new group blog - thanks to Jane for humoring me in my state of mild intoxication, and our exchange of pet photos, and for giving me some sound ideas for where I should take this crazy notion.

Stay tuned (or, tune out, whatever makes you happy).

Posted by Andy at 12:04 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (1)

April 18, 2003

A Quick One

Here's a harmless post. Enjoy the Friday Five.

  1. Who is your favorite celebrity?

    Based on what? I've always thought Eric Stoltz was an underrated actor, and Colin Farrell was quite good in Tigerland.

  2. Who is your least favorite?

    So many, so little time - the Osbournes, Fred Durst, the Olsen Twins - it just goes on and on.

  3. Have you ever met or seen any celebrities in real life?

    I've met Lou Reed (and got invited to a concert by his bassist who wanted to put me on the guest list after spending an hour talking to me on a flight) and Tony Randall (with his, at the time, young, beautiful, nubile wife) in real life.

    As far as who I've seen up close, I suppose Oliver North is there - we shared a flight once and sat a few rows apart. Oh, and some Finnish celebrity whose name I don't recall. Oh well.

    Oh, and my cousin is Bill Harlow, Director of PR for the CIA - you see his name on CNN a good bit.

  4. Would you want to be famous? Why or why not?

    Sure, if it came with enough money attached to make it worth the loss of privacy. I know, money is evil, blah de blah. Well, next time you're shopping, try to pay with a smile. I'll take money.

    And lots of it.

  5. If you had to trade places with a celebrity for a day, who would you choose and why?

    I have absolutely no idea. Can I trade places with Laetitia Casta's boyfriend instead?

And that's the Friday Five. Woo.

Posted by Andy at 08:43 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

The Pope's still alive?

It must be a good Friday when he can get up out of bed to rally the troops.

CNN: Pope to mark Iraq war and SARS

Yeah, whatever. Want to hear my favorite joke?

Q: How do you saw the Pope's hat in half?

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by at 04:23 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (1)

OK, One Post

Doug Dever is a privileged white boy.

And Vicky is taking a break.

Posted by Andy at 02:31 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Another Holiday

Posting will be light to non-existent today as it's a holiday for me. I'm sure there are plenty of other blogs out there to keep your interest.

And I need a break from this thing.

Back later.

Posted by Andy at 09:52 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

April 17, 2003

Wow, but it's a Small World

Perusing Jared's page just now, I was struck by a link to another page, and was Shocked and Awed to discover that I know the guy. We were in the same Boy Scout troop in Montgomery, Alabama as kids.

I wonder if Mat knows Kevin Bacon. I could make the database!

Posted by Tom at 11:44 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Don't Step in the Privilege

OK, that's it - we're officially tired of the blatant mischaracterizations that are offered up about us here at the WWR. The spark for this one off post was a gem from Jared claiming that:

...the WWR is starting to sound like a bunch of juvenile frat boys lately. i mean, it's always had the ring of privileged white boys to it, but now when i visit i feel like i'm behind some jackhole with a "no fat chicks" bumper sticker. quite impressive.
Sure, we can exhibit youthful exuberance - and sure, Laurence pushed some buttons with his last post (but that is what Laurence does, get used to it). But, let's visit this "privileged white boys" bullshit that Jared is offering up.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 10:07 PM | Comments (30) | TrackBack (3)

I Can Smell the Lawsuits From Here

A new study indicates that NBC's Fear Factor might be too scary for some:

NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - People experience a greater increase in heart rate and more distress watching the reality show "Fear Factor" than they do watching an actor in a similar situation in a fictional movie, according to a study released Thursday.

These findings suggest that, for some viewers -- such as those with a history of phobias or anxiety -- reality television may be simply too real, and unsafe as a result, the researchers conclude.

Hey, here's a simple solution - turn off the television set. Get off the sofa. Go outside. Breathe deeply. Smell that? That's fresh air. There's a lot of it to go around - make use of it.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 04:42 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Elizabeth Smart is Returning to Normal

...despite the best efforts of her parents and the media. I must admit I'm a bit confused by this:

The family has said they will not press Elizabeth to talk about her ordeal.
And this:
While the 15-year-old slowly reclaims her life, her family has hired a lawyer to handle book and movie offers that have poured in ever since Elizabeth was found with a self-proclaimed prophet nine months after she vanished from her bedroom.

Family spokeswoman Missy Larsen said the Smarts expect to choose within the next two weeks who they want to tell the story of the teen's ordeal.

Yup, no pressure on Elizabeth to talk - none at all. Why, I bet when that $7 million check from Paramount is lying on the table, they'll say:
"Nope, not our little girl - her story is hers and hers alone..., go on and tell the nice man your story, Elizabeth honey."

Posted by Andy at 04:22 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

If you're fat, sue McDonalds

If you're fat, something in your fat genes will compel you to sue McDonalds. Mug them for a big fat check with a big fat lawyer so you can stuff it in the pocket of your big fat pants. Sue them for having bathroom stalls to small to shove your bulk in to take a big fat crap. Sue them for that big purple Grimace figure mocking fat people with bruises. Sue them for the food that you shove down you big fat face being so fat.

Or, sue them for not hiring your big fat super-sized ass to slobber all over the fat food you want to cook and steal to stuff in your big fat face.

AP: Fat Man Sues McDonald's Over Non-Hire

That's right. A man is suing McDonalds because he is fat and wasn't hired.

A federal judge has refused to dismiss a lawsuit against McDonald's, filed by a New Haven man who claims he was not hired because he is overweight.

Joseph Connor had filed the lawsuit last year against the fast food chain, claiming that it discriminated against him, in violation of the Americans with Disabilities Act and the Connecticut Fair Employment Practices Act.

Connor, who weighs 420 pounds, claims that McDonald's violated the laws when it regarded him as morbidly obese and refused to hire him based on that perception. Further, he alleges that his obesity is a disability, and the restaurant chain violated the CFEPA by deliberately not hiring him.

U.S. District Judge Stefan R. Underhill concluded that Connor must be given the opportunity to prove that he is protected under the law.

If he isn't protected by the disability law, maybe he can seek protection under the Endangered Species Act because he's a big fat whiny land-whale.

Posted by at 03:22 PM | Comments (9) | TrackBack (0)

New Kid on the Block

The Blogmosis Boy Band* has acquired another member. Go check it out - he's irreverent, much like us, but without the monkeys.

And everyone loves monkeys.

*OK, Vicky isn't a boy. Or so we've been led to believe.

Posted by Andy at 12:59 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

A Discombobulated Ramble about Discombobulated Memories and Stuff

My brother-in-law had a stroke last week (which was surprising since he's 43 and has never smoked, done drugs, or lived with my mother) but is expected to make a full recovery. An unusual aspect of his illness though: for several days he was lodged in 1984.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 11:27 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Get the Picture?

Jody has a touching story on the ridiculous lengths to which gay members of our armed forces must go in order to not violate the idiocy of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."

Posted by Andy at 11:04 AM | Comments (11) | TrackBack (0)

April 16, 2003

PETA Says "Ejaculate for Animal Rights!"

On a note similar to the wank-a-thon mentioned below...

Aw, poor, poor PETA:

PETA, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, translated the slogan "Dump Dairy" to get their message across to Spanish-speaking schoolchildren in the US.

But the literal translation "Eche la leche" can also mean "Discharge sperm" in slang, reports the Sun Sentinel.

The slogan was fixed to a life-size model of a cow that had been touring schools in Florida.

The problem was raised by a school principal in Palm Springs.

PETA officials were surprised by the complaint.

Surprised? Uh, is it normal to be telling kids that a giant cow wants to spooge copious amounts of bovine goo on them? Maybe I went to the wrong schools.
William Rivas-Rivas, the campaign's coordinator, said: "As a Spanish speaker I've never heard of that slang. Never once has anyone said anything about that."
Once again showing that PETA is unable to grasp that they might be misguided about something, Mr Rivas-Rivas (a man so nice they named him twice) apparently doesn't realize that slang in Spanish differs from country to country, just as it does, say, between the US and the UK. Bonehead.

Posted by Andy at 06:04 PM | Comments (14) | TrackBack (1)

Today's "You Gotta Be Sh*ttin' Me" Entry

A Masturbate-a-Thon.

Only in San Francisco.

Posted by Tom at 05:34 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (1)

Ah, Sweet Memories

I used to have a job in which I inspected old wells and water tanks for the state of Alabama. When I was new at the job, I was given (of course) the most godawful, out-of-repair, so-far-back-in-the-woods-that-they-had-to-pipe-daylight-in systems in the whole state.

And when you're talking rural Alabama, that's saying something.

One day, I was out in the woods and had to inspect a very old-style water tank which basically looked like a small chicken house with a large door at one end. I had to get in and test for chlorine, inspect the general state of repair, etc.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Tom at 03:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Spike TV?

AP: Cable TV's TNN Changes Name to Spike

TNT is Law and Order TV in the evenings, so why not declare that TNN has become the TNG Network (Star Trek The Next Generation)?

Struggling TNN — which just two years ago changed from The Nashville Network to The National Network_ announced Tuesday that, effective June 16, it will call itself Spike TV and become the first network aimed specifically at men.

"We just like the idea of having a guy's name," said Albie Hecht, network president. "We thought that was smart and fun and irreverent."

Labels are meaningless. content is king. Will they be getting The Man Show for syndication?

Posted by at 11:56 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Looking Out for You, Dear Reader

I think one of the best things about the blogosphere is all the amazing things you can learn, the helpful hints that are shared, the tips and tricks that can make all of our lives that much easier and/or brighter. So, in that spirit, I offer all of you the following.

After applying muscle "heat" rub because you overdid it in the gym after a 9 month hiatus, be sure to thoroughly wash your hands. And, under no circumstances should you use the bathroom before doing so.

Trust me on this one.

Posted by Andy at 08:22 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0)

April 15, 2003

The Revolution Will Be Televised

Not only does Michele have her boobies, but she'll soon be showing them on CNN. Wow!

Go, Michele!

Posted by Andy at 08:58 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Honda's Commercial Success

OK, this is simply cool. Enjoy.

Thanks to Zuly!

Posted by Andy at 08:53 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

The Man in Black Prescribes Some Prozac

I am not a particularly sentimental person and I loathe lounge lizard standards. Why then does Johnny Cash's cover of "First Time Ever I Saw Your Face" damned near bring me to tears (especially since it fills my head with unwanted images of 'the first time ever I lay with' June Carter?)

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 03:36 PM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (0)

Uday trumps and one eyed Shi'ites are wild...

By now you've heard of the fifty-five card Iraq's most wanted playing card set that Dubya and John Walsh have given to the troops to help with the casting call for JUDGMENT AT NUREMBERG 2: WEEKEND AT GöRINGS. (Among other things it alerts troops to be on the lookout for a guy with Arabic features and facial hair.)

Not surprisingly they're now for sale on the web in several places (including here). Personally, I think that you'll need to sit on them for a few years, but these are the collectible you can give your grandkids when lying about how you singlehandedly captured Tariq Aziz while he was dressed as a woman in Livonia, GA.
Personally, I'm holding out on souvenir purchases until some of the cuneiform and mother goddesses looted from the antiquities museum go up for sale on e-Bay.

Posted by Jon at 03:18 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Moore of the Same, Revisited

The sloppy, slobbery everyman (in his dreams) is at it again, lashing out at the Bush administration before an audience at the University of Texas:

Moore said the United States is at war with Iraq because Mr. Bush needed to keep the public’s eye off his domestic failures as president.
Odd, because all the news right now is that Bush is tackling the economic issues as the dust of war settles across Iraq. Surely if the plan was to take our eyes off of domestic problems, the war would still be raging - our troops would have been sent in unprepared for the challenge, or undermanned - and we'd still be outside of Baghdad saying "Let us in!"

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 01:56 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

The Good, The Bad, and the Hasselhoff

It seems (ok, not really, but work with me here) that every bit of good media news seems to come tinged with an equal share of bad, thereby keeping the Karmic balance of the Mediaverse in equilibrium, lest Jaleel White ever star in another sitcom and torment us again.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 10:10 AM | Comments (14) | TrackBack (0)


REUTERS: Aluminum in Drinking Water Tied to Alzheimer's

After the aluminum pot scare, I guess it's time there was a new way for aluminum to scare us. Shoddy aluminum pipes shedding bits and pieces of aluminum, dissolving into molecules, now that's something to be scared of.

While there have been suggestions that aluminum cookware might pose a risk for Alzheimer's, the type of aluminum used in pots and pans consists of multiple molecules and does not appear to affect human cells, according to Prolo. "There is almost no evidence that the cookware is dangerous," he said.

So aluminum in drinking water is a hazard now? Well, there goes my party trick for staying sober while everybody gets ripped off their asses.

You see, instead of putting gin or scotch or bourbon in my drink with water, I'd put a generous helping of aluminum shavings in my glass. Then I'd cover it with water, stir, and it would only appear that I was drinking while I was really just sipping soggy aluminum shavings.

I guess I've got to change to gravel or copper shavings now.

Posted by at 06:59 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (1)

April 14, 2003

Blogosphere News

Yes, you've already heard the news. Everyone's favorite Long Islander is all grown up and "Fred! She's gotten her boobies!"*

Give Michele a big round of applause!

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 07:05 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

The Envelope Please, 2...

booty.jpgEither tomorrow or the next day (for I shall act in my own time, selah), I'll be asking for nominees for the First Annual John Wilkes Booth Awards for Outstanding Achievement in Misguided Political Activism by an Actor or an Actress, or as they shall be known henceforth and in all of my official biographies, The Booty Awards.

So be thinking of some names (Susan Sarandon? Michael Moore? Sean Penn? Third Dixie Chick from Right?) as we're all going to vote and then go with my decision.

Posted by Jon at 06:25 PM | Comments (40) | TrackBack (3)

The Envelope, Please!

By royal decree, the caption contest has reached its shelf life and has started to stink up the place a little, so we decided it was high time to award a prize!

Using our patented, 10-step, double-blind, PricewaterhouseCoopers-supervised counting methodology (Andy and I hashed out who we liked best, and believe me, it was based on who puts out and who doesn't,) we have ourselves a winner!

::drum roll::

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Tom at 02:53 PM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (1)

Taking Their Cue from a Master

When did ScrappleFace move to Saudi Arabia?:

Below is an excerpt from an editorial that appeared on the Web site of the London-based, Saudi-owned media organization.

Frankly, I missed Mohammad Said al-Sahhaf. He is the only Iraqi official who I think deserves full amnesty on all his previous crimes, because of his cuteness when he was lying in the face of the disaster. But where is Mohammad Said al-Sahhaf? Where are Saddam and his sons? Where is Tarek Aziz? Where is the rest of the gang?

I heard that al-Sahhaf has been captured, and then he issued a statement denying it, and declaring that he was the one who actually captured the Americans. Then I heard that when Saddam's statue was destroyed in Baghdad, al-Sahhaf made a statement to say that the statue was for one of Saddam's doubles.


Posted by Andy at 01:51 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

A Global Bill of Rights

From where else, but San Francisco!

For five years, Boyd has devoted his life to researching and crafting a document he says will revolutionize the way the world treats its citizens.

His may seem like a Sisyphean task, but Boyd -- a human rights lawyer who lives in Mill Valley -- believes the time is right for an International Bill of Rights that guarantees free speech, freedom of religion, access to free or low-cost health care, shelter, education, fair trials and a host of other "absolute" priorities.

Aside from the obvious problems that I continue to point out with the nanny state (what is low-cost? what is adequate shelter? what is a minimal standard of healthcare?), Boyd fails to realize that such a Bill of Rights is only meaningful if someone actually guarantees said rights. And where does Boyd envision such a guarantee originating?
Under Boyd's plan, the European Court of Human Rights, which is based in Strasbourg, France, would become the International Court of Human Rights.
Of course, it isn't even remotely clear how this court will enforce the new law (aside from some nebulous reference to the courts of each country, assuming they bother to listen) - and I think the latest UN debacle makes it pretty clear that such global organizations are toothless tigers unless the United States decides to humor them. So, assuming that the United States isn't going to want to play micro-manager to every little issue in the world (which is what several of these rights would require), what penalties are envisioned for those who stray from the global bill of rights?
The document (available online at states that "Failure to comply with the decisions of the court may result in expulsion from the United Nations."
Well, that'd be a damn shame, wouldn't it?

You know, I think some of the rights are a good idea - ones that should be spread to all the world (free speech, freedom of religion), and I think others will be a socialist nightmare stunting progress until the whole system implodes. Idealism is a wonderful, wonderful thing - pragmatic realism is a little more useful.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 01:24 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Amish Cat Redux

Given that it is Pet Blogging Day, what better day to bring back fond memories of when Laurence had his webcam up, allowing all the world to see his cats in their dignified glory and elegant cat-ness?

I say, there is no better day than today. And thus, I give you this:

And that is your kitty cat moment of zen for today.

Posted by Andy at 11:22 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Huh, Imagine That... Progress.

More evidence that the market solves problems:

The world still largely relies on diminishing supplies of environmentally unfriendly and politically destabilizing fossil fuels. Despite decades of research, it's still cheaper to burn coal than get power from the sun.

But photovoltaic technology is improving efficiency and lowering costs for solar power, and experts believe the development will in the next few years drive solar adoption far faster than any government incentives or environmental concerns.

Unfortunately, the same people who yammer on and on about environmental concerns and the need for massive government regulation are the same ones who seem to hate the idea of allowing markets to drive progress. But drive it they do - so get onboard or get run over.

Posted by Andy at 10:53 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

More Russkie Fun, Comrade

Not content to just pass on to the Iraqi regime secret information regarding Tony Blair:

Russia funneled spy secrets to Saddam Hussein and... Moscow was still training Iraqi spies last fall, in violation of U.N. sanctions, reports say.
Odd how those who demanded we listen to the UN continually seem to be devout members of the "Do As I Say, Not As I Do" camp. I'm curious how much damage these revelations will do to US-Russian relations.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 10:45 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

What have I done?

Matt has gone ahead and re-christened Vicky's site as Liquid Wombat Cave. What, oh what, have I created?

Although, based on what I've learned about wombats in the last 24 hours, I think "Liquid Wombat Hole" would have been more appropriate.

Posted by Andy at 09:49 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

California Shredded Chicken, Fargo-style

REUTERS: Farmers Put Live Chickens in Wood Chippers

Saddam put human beings in plastic/paper shredders, so it stands to reason that the dictators and brutal Liberal despots of California would do the same to chickens in woodchippers.

Maybe PETA will get their rocks off over this one, screaming that the chickens should have been tossed in the ovens like Jews in the Chickencaust instead of shredded modern-machine style?

Two California poultry farmers who fed some 30,000 live chickens into wood chippers will not face criminal charges because they had permission from the U.S. Department of Agriculture, prosecutors said on Friday.

But a spokesman for the Humane Society of the United States called the farmers "callous and barbaric" and disagreed with the decision not to prosecute them.

The farmers needed to destroy the chickens because they were "spent" -- or no longer able to produce eggs -- and could not make chicken soup out of them because the farms were under quarantine for the poultry virus Exotic Newcastle Disease, District Attorney's spokeswoman Gayle Stewart said.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by at 09:16 AM | Comments (11) | TrackBack (1)

Support the Troops

If you've been wondering how you can help our injured (or ill) armed forces members and their families, Susanna Cornett has a good suggestion. For those of us who have wanted to say thank you, and for those who have complained about budget cuts for veteran care, this might be a nice way for all of us to put our money where our mouth is.

Payday is tomorrow - I'll be cutting a check.

Posted by Andy at 09:10 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Blogospheric Pet Emporium

Jay and Jane have launched their "Can't We All Just Get Along?" goodwill initiative - Pet Blogging Day!

Feel free to skip over the first half of the cute and cuddly animals so that you can see our dogs, Eddie and Sydney. Stare at them for a while - stand in awe of their magnificent pet-osity - and then humor the other contributors by checking out their animals too.

OK, admittedly, they're all pretty darn cute.

Posted by Andy at 08:59 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

April 13, 2003 See, Do plagiarize Doug Dever too.

What is it with some bloggers plagiarizing from their sources? First, the story of The Agonist brings shame to the blogosphere, and I just know that soon WaPo, NYTimes, and Instapundit will be breaking this story with banner headlines.

The end of the blogosphere is nigh!

A lesson for new bloggers or those thinking of starting their own: Don't be this guy. If you want to be accepted and not looked upon as a no-talent assplow, then link to people if you find what they have to say interesting or witty. Beyond that, if you're going to just blatantly plagiarize others, you probably don't want to do a one-time, hit-and-run in the comments section of the site you're ripping off hoping to get some hits.

Posted by Andy at 08:44 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Helping Others

Nothing makes me happier than helping other people. OK, actually, a lot of things do, but helping people certainly does make one feel good. Not as good as, say, sex or winning the lottery, but it ranks right up there.

Somewhere. Seriously. I'd provide the actual rankings, but we'd be here all day.

Anyway, my point is that my dear friend Vicky had some concerns about her blog and where it was headed.

As I'm always happy to give advice, even if I have to make it up on the spot, I obliged.

I think she'll be pleased.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 06:14 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Justifying the invasion of Iraq

Nevermind the oil, the WMD, the oppression, the political murders, and the gassing of Kurds - this alone is reason enough to bring down the regime:

Many of the writings Uday left behind are mundane, like a few cards from his handwritten video-collection catalog. The Ls include License to Kill (two copies), Like Father Like Son and Loose Cannons.
License to Kill surely wasn't good enough to warrant owning two copies, and god knows that Like Father Like Son and Loose Cannons don't even deserve to be rented, let alone owned.

Next we'll find out that those damn Hussein boys really were into Vin Diesel movies too.

We have stopped the insanity.

Posted by Andy at 02:33 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Another weekend ends

Quite a fun day today - spent several hours clearing nearly two years of dirt and grime out of the garage, replaced the garage door opener light bulbs, installed two bicycle mounts, hooks for our snow tires, and then washed my car. It's been an unusually productive Sunday.

I should look into stopping that as soon as possible.

The wife is making tuna melts for us downstairs - and then the rest of the day will be spent like a sloth, without the hanging upside-down bit. This, of course, assumes I can pretend not to hear her when she asks me to change the mounting of the curtain rod in the nursery or to put together the nursery cart.

We've got plenty of time for that - why, it's at least three weeks before the World Wide Runt will join the ranks of society (plenty of time to help us buy stuff - heh).

In the news, seven of our POWs have been released and the Iraqis in Baghdad are contemplating their futures:

Nonetheless, the mass meeting represented the first real move by Iraqis themselves to re-establish a civil administration. Many said they wanted to begin work to show the world they could build a democracy in the ruins of Saddam Hussein's regime.
I wish them nothing but the best in their effort - and we had better support them.

Posted by Andy at 01:58 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

April 12, 2003


Just when I was considering cutting way back on the beer and the caffeine, I have to read something like this:

A caffeine and alcohol cocktail similar to an Irish coffee could prevent severe brain damage in stroke victims, new research has revealed.

The experimental drug, called caffeinol, has the potency of two cups of strong coffee and a small shot of alcohol. When injected into rats within three hours of an artificially stimulated stroke, brain damage was cut by up to 80 per cent.

Alrighty then, line up another round, boys - to our health!

Posted by Andy at 09:55 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (1)

Sweets for the children...

...alms for the poor.

Well, everyone else seems to be doing it, so why the heck not - if you look down and to the left, you'll see a little PayPal button. It's just saying click me, click me, click me, isn't it?


Anyway - it's only there on the off chance somebody feels compelled to support this endeavor. We do it for the fun of it, but our hosting company doesn't take good cheer as payment for services - so, if you feel moved by the spirit or a minor case of intestinal gas, feel free to help us pay our way.

And besides, Tom works for the government, Jon's a librarian, and I've got the World Wide Runt on the way.* Surely that brings a tear to your eye and makes you want to help, right?


Hmmm, oh well, worth a shot. Thanks for reading!

* What about Laurence? He's doing pretty well for himself over at Amish Tech Support.

Posted by Andy at 03:28 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

RMBB II - The Aftermath

An enjoyable evening all around. Got to see some old friends and make some new ones - play pool (badly) and drink beer (very well). We all have our talents. Courtesy of lots of water and a B-complex vitamin, I feel just fine this morning.

RoverPundit and his lovely significant other are in the guest room, one of them struggling to rejoin the living. Soon we're off to Chipotle for some Mexican grub.

Let's do it again soon and Stephen, I'll give you a ring the next time we put together a My Brother's Bar gathering.

If anyone else writes a recap, feel free to link it up in the comments or Trackback ping to this entry.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 11:10 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (1)

April 11, 2003

The Spoils of War No More

American armed forces in Iraq have been collecting keepsakes to take home with them from the battle. That's about to change:

On Friday, they were ordered to dump what they took or lose their rank.

"You did not conquer ... this country. Get off your high horse," Lt. Col. Michael Belcher told his officers. "You took some thugs and ran them out."

The commander of the 3rd Battalion, 7th Marines, reminded his soldiers that the Iraqi people allowed U.S.-led forces to oust Saddam Hussein. They deserve respect, he said, and that means no looting.

I personally don't see a problem with taking pictures of Saddam - I seriously doubt the Iraqis really will miss them. The rest, though, leave it for the people of Iraq - they will need it as they rebuild their country after 30 years of a tyrant.

Posted by Andy at 03:00 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

A Hell of a Cool Evening

Last night my girlfriend and I braved the cold and the wet to sit in the cave at Russell Cave National Monument and listen to a Cherokee storyteller tell creation stories and play a traditional Cherokee flute.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Tom at 01:58 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

American Economy Decimated!

Economists across the United States are hurriedly working on extensive reports to detail the massive derailing of the U.S. economy over the last two weeks. Unemployment has surged as corporations, experiencing massive losses on an unprecedented scale, have scaled back their staff - in some cases as much as 25% in a single cut. Initial indications are that the cause of this state of financial ruin can be attributed to the Boycott Brand America campaign of Adbusters.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 01:32 PM | Comments (17) | TrackBack (0)

Does everyone have their towel?


Posted by Andy at 12:30 PM | Comments (9) | TrackBack (2)

Make-o Up-o Your-o Mind-o, Comrade

Russian President Vladimir Putin is praising the fall of Saddam, but contending that the use of force was not the way to go about it:

Speaking alongside German Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder at a conference in Russia's second city, he said: "We always said that the regime of Saddam Hussein does not correspondent to democracy and human rights ... but you can not solve such problems with military means."
Wait, wasn't Putin just celebrating the fall of Saddam which, like it or not, occurred by military means? How does one say "make up your mind" in Russian?

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 11:51 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

A new artform?

Fisking by Faux-Signs, from Matt of Overtaken by Events.

Posted by Andy at 10:36 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (0)

The cost of war

Fortune's Geoffrey Colvin provides the numbers:

The average family is being asked to pay $625 for the war. If we assume the cost will come from federal tax receipts one way or another, then average families in the poorest quintile by income would pay not $625, but just $33 each. By contrast, families in the richest 5% would pay, on average, $4,700 each. Families in the richest 1% would pay $13,000 each.

Is this fair? Unfair? Decide for yourself, but keep the big picture in mind. Conventional wisdom holds, correctly, that income inequality has been increasing in recent years, though it still isn't as great now as in some past periods. But while incomes are distributed unequally, the federal tax burden is distributed far more unequally.


Posted by Andy at 10:23 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Eason Jordan's Devil's Bargain(s)

It's one thing to stay neutral from a story to remain unbiased and capable of reporting the truth, but it's an entire different matter when you utterly divorce yourself from humanity and allow horrors, brutality, and torture to happen under your watch all for the pursuit of what you market is a real and unimpeded flow of information.

Eason Jordan, chief news executive of CNN, confesses now what he claims he couldn't tell before out of fear of Saddam's regime. Eason no less than confesses... I take that back - begs for forgiveness for the disconnect between truth and journalism on a major news network, all for the sake of a promotable bauble such as "The only American news network with a bureau in Iraq."

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by at 09:20 AM | Comments (14) | TrackBack (7)

The ghost of Trent Lott

I'm not sure what more needs to be said about this:

A House debate over gun rights legislation erupted into a racially charged dispute yesterday when a Republican lawmaker from Wyoming seemed to equate African Americans with drug addicts or people undergoing drug treatment.
Open mouth, insert foot.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 08:20 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

You're nothing but a deck of cards...

The United States is issuing a Most Wanted list for Iraq. Do Saddam's doubles count as individual members of the list, or are they included with Saddam in a package deal?

The list is being distributed as a deck of cards with profiles and pictures. I wonder if the troops will try to get their autographs before detaining or neutralizing their quarry, swapping these creeps like baseball cards.

"I got a signed Rookie-year Tariq Aziz... I'll but I'll take two Baghdad Bobs and a Chemical Ali for him!"

"Sheeeee-it! Joe over there has the REAL Chemical Ali... well, bits of him."

"Fine, I'll toss in a Qusay Gold-foil edition."

Posted by at 08:19 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

As the excitement ends...

Now that the excitement of the Open Letter is dying down, first let me offer my thanks to the 2500 or so of you that have stopped by to read it so far. It was great to see the reaction it generated and the conversations it sparked in the comments.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 07:09 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

*SNAP* I Knew There Was A Reason...

...I didn't like Uday Hussein.

With the Iraqi forces gone, residents began looting the area -- including a Pepsi soft drink factory said to be owned by Saddam's son, Uday.
He's a Pepsi man. Nasty.

Posted by Tom at 12:49 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

April 10, 2003

Don't forget

Tomorrow, April 11, 2003 is the date of Rocky Mountain Blogger Bash II (aka as, thanks to Dork, the Son of Skull-Crushing Hangovers).

Details are here. Hope to see you there.

And don't worry - what happens at the RMBB stays at the RMBB, unless you happen to be Dever caught on film in a Ted Kennedy-esque moment.*

* He was drunk, not driving young women off of bridges, by the way.

Posted by Andy at 09:44 PM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (0)


Dietz Smith, of The Rant, is eating his own words and owning up to it.

Several weeks back I said that if President Bush pulled off the Iraq War without it turning in to regional chaos I would sing his praises. Even though I realize the War is not over and the long-term impact of the conflict is not yet realized I am prepared to eat crow.

Posted by Andy at 07:52 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Hello, Nurse!

I've watched Nurse Betty twice now, and I'm still laughing my ass off. I mean, sure, the first time I watched it I was doped to the gills with codeine, antibiotics, and an inhaler. But then, if I really had gills, I wouldn't have had to worry about this bronchitis. I wouldn't have bronchi, you see... unless I was an amphibian, then I'd have both bronchi and whatever gills or vilii or things gills have on them.

Anyway, Morgan Freeman is one of my favorite actors, and it's a shame he gets overlooked so often. Chris Rock teams up with him and they're such a pair. Nurse Betty herself, who is played by someone almost as delusional as her character, is completely out of touch with reality, and I don't blame her. I was out of touch with reality for the first run of the movie, which made it all the funnier.

In fact, I laughed so hard, I bit through the thermometer. Isn't it amazing that we can realize that thermometers are a potentially poisonous and sharp object in our mouths, so we invent digital ones that can shock us to death instead or poison us with swallowed watch batteries?

After all that laughing, it turns out that I only bruised a rib and didn't crack one. Hooray for modern medicine! I'd give this movie two thumbs up, but I'm having trouble with blurred vision. Are these my thumbs and are there two of them?

Great! Enjoy the show, and try not to guess anything. You'll just be wrong and you'll only have to get your jaw off the floor that many more times.

Posted by at 07:49 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

An Open Letter to the People of Iraq

I recently dreamed up an idea, passed it by a few people (Michele, Laurence, and Stephen) to see what they thought, and this is the end result.

I'm curious if those who have opposed this war from the start are willing to tell the Iraqi people that they didn't want them to be free. So, I wrote this open letter for the anti-war crowd to sign with street-blocking, sidewalk-puking pride. Ideally, I'd like a blogger in DC or New York to print it out after a couple weeks and deliver it to the Iraqis that will represent the soon-to-be-established government in Baghdad (if interested, drop me an e-mail).

I'd like the Iraqi people, at least in some measure, to know the truth. I'm curious if the anti-war crowd will tell them.

Click below for the open letter - and sign with pride, protesters!

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 05:00 PM | Comments (187) | TrackBack (10)

Holocaust denier or just ignernt?

Holocaust denier or idiot?

My three favorite reference questions today:

1. “Do you have any books on Shakespeare’s use of the ass in “Midsummer’s Last Dreaming”?

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 04:33 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Brian Whitaker, Ankle-Biting Bitch

Nothing's ever good enough for these people, is it?

You can just see the elitist, world-weary, tobacco-stained Euro-sneer, can't you?

Posted by Tom at 02:54 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Screw Iraq- Liberate Paradise Vendors!


Forget the Koran, use the Bible for birdcage liner, light your furnace with the plays of Shakespeare, the greatest book yet written was in fact A Confederacy of Dunces by  John Kennedy Toole.

The movie rights have been sold more than Uncle Tom, but now they’re in the hands of Drew Barrymore. God have mercy on her benighted soul- she’s going to appear herself as an expanded version of the stripper, Darlene, but today she committed further blasphemy and announced in a French interview that Ignatius will be played by Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 02:53 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Liar For Hire

One of the world's biggest liars, Ambassador to the United Nations from the Former Saddamist Regime of Iraq Mohammed Al-Douri, is beginning to realize that he's just become unemployed, or at least not going to be getting the weekly paychecks and expense report checks from home:

With U.S. troops in the heart of Baghdad, Iraq's U.N. Ambassador Mohammed Aldouri declared on Thursday that "everything is over" and there was no government in Iraq left for him to represent. "Everything is over. There is no government that I represent. I am representing my country right now," he said.

Rumors had been sweeping the United Nations that Aldouri was planning to leave New York and some television reports had him on a plane to Paris late on Wednesday.

Yeah, they can use more lying-assed double-dealing anti-American scumbags with bad combovers in Paris. Break his nose twice and he might be able to double for Jacques Chirac.

Posted by at 01:21 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Thumbs Pricking, Film at 11

Well, the war isn't over yet, but you can buy up shed-off pieces of the regime on eBay!

During the three-week war in Iraq, collectors have swamped the Internet trading site with more than 1,000 items, including Iraqi money, T-shirts and videos that capitalize on Saddam's notoriety. One seller touting the "Saddam dinar," one of two currencies used in Iraq, was quick to advertise his item as a piece of history certain to grow in value when the war is over.

"With the current world situation, chances are this will be the last currency available coming out of Iraq, at least with Saddam's picture on it," the seller wrote.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by at 10:33 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Something wicked this way comes

I have a bad feeling about this.

Stay tuned.

Update: For those who have asked, the bad feeling was about the impending first post of our newest contributor, Mr. Laurence Simon. 'Twas a joke, nothing more.

Posted by Andy at 10:14 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Pleasantly surprised

Someway, somehow, via Josh Claybourn (I can't recall precisely how, actually - that's what beer and wine can do, kids, so heed my warning) - anyway, I came across this guy, Matthew Lilley, who is essentially a one-man band called "Band of Apathetics."

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 09:08 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (1)

No, really, we supported you!

Apparently convinced that the MTV-generation of Americans, with their attention span of roughly 42 seconds, will have forgotten the backstabbing treachery of the French government prior to the war:

French President Jacques Chirac hailed the fall of Iraqi President Saddam Hussein government in Iraq and said he hoped the fighting in the country would end soon, his office announced.

"France, like all democracies, is delighted at the fall of the dictatorship of Saddam Hussein and hopes for a quick and effective end to the fighting," Chirac's office said in a statement.

So delighted, they are, that they did nothing to help bring it about - and actually worked against the fall of the butcher of Baghdad. Yep, nothing says "working toward a mutual goal" like complete stonewalling.
What is urgent is to allow humanitarian aid in all its forms to be sent to Iraq without delay. As soon as possible, after the necessary phase of ensuring security, Iraq must re-discover -- via the legitimacy granted by the United Nations -- its full sovereignty in a stabilised region," it said.
The legitimacy granted by the United Nations? When did this happen? I think as far as many Americans are concerned, the UN has little -if any- legitimacy left (but then that kind of thing happens when Libya, Sudan, and China get to be on the UN Human Rights Commission *snort*).

I wonder what the rest of life is like in Chirac's alternate universe?

Posted by Andy at 08:53 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Rad, indeed

Josh Claybourn carries this story:

So far, Marine nuclear and intelligence experts have discovered 14 buildings that betray high levels of radiation. Some of the readings show nuclear residue too deadly for human occupation.

A few hundred meters outside the complex, where peasants say the "missile water" is stored in mammoth caverns, the Marine radiation detectors go "off the charts."

"It's amazing," said Chief Warrant Officer Darrin Flick, the battalion's nuclear, biological and chemical warfare specialist. "I went to the off-site storage buildings, and the rad detector went off the charts. Then I opened the steel door, and there were all these drums, many, many drums, of highly radioactive material."

You know, just sayin' is all.

Posted by Andy at 01:29 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

In Remembrance

I am a man of good humor. I like to make jokes, even in times of distress. And once upon a whenever, I had a bit of fun at the expense of a tribute concert for the victims of the fire at the Great White concert on February 20, 2003.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 01:19 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

From the Dissident Frogman

A couple of months old, but still quite relevant, I think.

Posted by Tom at 01:07 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

For Every Generation...

...there's a gap. Or two. Or two and a half, really:

The episode was the first of several this season teaming the creators of the show, Matt Stone, 31, and Trey Parker, 33, with grand poohbah of American television satire, Norman Lear, the 80-year-old who in his youth — all right, his middle age — produced groundbreaking shows like "All in the Family," "Maude" and "Sanford and Son."
That's right, Norman Lear is now working on South Park. And why is that?

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 01:05 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Teens Take Break From Tiger Beat - Liberate Iraq

I love this:

"Slumber Party at the Basra Palace! Baathists not invited!"

But that hunky Scott Baio is always welcome. Rowwwr!

Thanks to VodkaPundit for the image, and Andy for the (admittedly half-assed, if that) Photoshoppery.

Mind you, we think these women kick ass.

Posted by Tom at 12:52 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

April 09, 2003

Not without my gerbil

Richard Gere is willing to risk becoming Lifer Larry's "bought for a pack of Kools sex slave" if it means Tibet will be free. (Is anybody else hearing "Please don't throw me in that briar patch!"?)

Actually, I'm with him 110%. I have always been willing for Richard Gere to go to jail if it will free Tibet. In fact, throw in a free trip for me and a guest to Istanbul and I'd be willing to send him to to the chair.

When I was at the University of Alabama there was a fairly active "Free Tibet" student group. At the time I thought they were a bunch of Birkenstocked dweebs, but only later did I read Jhiang's comment "If those meddling kids in Tuscaloosa had sold just one more cupcake, Lhasa Apsa would be singing Hello Dalai today... I was scared."

Posted by Jon at 05:45 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Coke Ads Life Everlasting, or, The Kurosawa Kode

Since one of today's threads is about miracles involving Jesus and his Mama and them, I thought I'd share this bit that I e-mailed to Tom and Andy earlier this week:

The Sawaguchi clan, a dangerously inbred family on the Japanese island of Shingo (Japanese for "Butcher Holler"), might not be able to get into the Daughters of the American Revolution but they have a more than excellent shot at getting past the gold ropes of the Studio 54 in the Sky, cause they don't just know the owner- they're his kids.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 05:24 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Klink! Klink! Klink! went the Nazi...

As he's announced by now, our liege and lord Andy, Blessed and Ever Virgin, and his compatriot One Friend Tom™, the Cave Sage, have given me logon info and permission to blog as part of their treaty with the Hittites. Since I’m still trying to figure out these new Internet doin’s, this is more of a test run that an actual post, but it does contain some fascinating (if only to me) trivia…

So, do you remember Burkhalter, the Luftwaffe general who invariably let those zany madcap burrowing POWs with their underground Club Med get the better of him on Hogan's Heroes? He was old and obese even then, but not only is he still alive, he has his own web site.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Jon at 04:24 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

A little change

Andy says: One of the many exciting changes planned for the WWR is the addition of new contributors. Well, a couple. So far, this one - but there could be another. Time will tell. Many of you have been wondering why prolific commenter Jon Darby doesn't have a blog - well, now he does, at the WWR. We've asked him to introduce himself, and it goes a little sumfin' like dis...

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Posted by Jon at 02:33 PM | Comments (13) | TrackBack (1)

We love the GOP!

Oh wait, no, we don't.

Working with the Bush administration, Congressional Republicans are maneuvering to make permanent the sweeping antiterrorism powers granted to federal law enforcement agents after the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, officials said today.
More evidence that when the people grant a power to the government, it is loathe to give it back. We'll be backing the Democrats on this one.

Posted by Andy at 01:17 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Fair, Balanced - Part III

I don't know about you guys, but I have this constant urge to check news sources that will mindlessly confirm my most jingoistic and knee-jerk patriotic, pro-war-and-mutilation outlook. Cause, you know, I hate kids.

You know, like Al Jazeera.

Granted, their front page still just steams with frankly anti-American hoopla (including one article, as Andy points out, that makes no logical sense. If we'd wanted to plant WoMD's, we'd have done it long before now, instead of having scare after scare and then recanting...but perhaps that's what we WANT them to think! Occam is slashing his ossified wrists with his Razor even now,) but here's what they have to say, in part, about the occupation of Baghdad:

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Posted by Tom at 01:10 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Gratuitous Googling

Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr. Dick Smothers Jr.

Go here and all will make sense.

Update: Matt beat me to the punch by one minute. Boo hiss.

Posted by Andy at 09:54 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (2)

All eyes on Baghdad

The Beeb is offering a live view of Baghdad here:


Posted by Andy at 09:42 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Out of tragedy, triumph

Contrary to the accusations of some, pro-war supporters are - I believe - moved by the scenes of carnage and destruction that this war has brought to some of the innocent people in Iraq. I doubt anyone can look on an injured innocent, and not feel sympathy for them - it would be simply inhuman. OK, perhaps Saddam and his sons could.

On the larger scale, though, we are even more moved by scenes like: this, this, this, and this.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 09:18 AM | Comments (32) | TrackBack (0)

D'accord, tricot fete!

Ooh, this will teach us a lesson:

BERLIN (Reuters) - A group of German university professors, angered by the U.S.-British war against Iraq (news - web sites), have launched a campaign to replace many popular English-language words used in Germany with French terms.

Saying they are appalled by the way the United States and Britain defied the will of the United Nations and attacked Iraq, the four professors declared war on borrowed English terms in German such as "okay," "T-shirt" and "party."

They have devised French-language alternatives: "d'accord," "tricot" and "fete."

Much like invading Russia in winter, these Germans have engaged in an exercise in futility, eclipsing even the monumental stupidity of the effort to rename French toast to "freedom" toast.
"That's not our aim," Burkhardt said. "We are not trying to permanently ban English terms...We are urging French alternatives because of our solidarity with France."

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 08:32 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

April 08, 2003

A little pet levity

Jay and Jane from The Daily Rant are hosting an online event to lighten up the mood that the war has brought to the blogosphere - Pet Blogging Day. Sounds like a good idea to me, so two of the four members of our menagerie have their photos speeding through the internet as I type.

Perhaps Tom will submit his cat, Porkchop, to the constellation of pet stars.

Now, in the spirit of good petsmanship, I offer the following ground rules:

Liberals, please do not demand that we raise taxes to get all homeless animals into minimal living standards or that we institute quotas so that minority breeds are adopted as often as "popular" breeds.

Conservatives, please don't cut taxes so that rich people can have more dogs and cats than poor people, and don't kick the cute puppies and kitties (the ugly ones, well, maybe just once)*.

* Bite me, PETA, it's a joke.

Posted by Andy at 09:49 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

I'm famous

My very own photo of the Rocky Mountains is now the header image at The Blog of the Century of the Week. It's been horribly marred by a giant, floating TBOTCOTW logo, but it's recognizable all the same. It was taken on I-70W back in May, 2002; those of you from these parts probably know the view.

I love Colorado.

Posted by Andy at 07:34 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Well, it's an improvement

I saw my first anti-war protest in Denver on the drive home today (there have been others, but I've not been present). The protesters (all three of them) were standing atop the 20th street I-25 overpass, a banner unfurled which read "Bring Our Troops Home Now," and waving much like one might expect a furry toystore mascot to wave at the Grand Opening of the newest location. It seemed an odd juxtaposition.

To their immense credit, they were being very peaceful - not getting in anyone's way - not committing near acts of treason by blocking wartime ports - and for that, I thank them. For protesters like them, I have nothing but respect, even if I disagree and make a little fun of their waving.

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Posted by Andy at 06:26 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

An adventure in Dickensian justice

Oh sweet Jesus, our troops are emptying the prisons of Baghdad - letting hardened criminals out:

BAGHDAD (AFP) - More than 100 children held in a prison celebrated their freedom as US marines rolled into northeast Baghdad amid chaotic scenes which saw civilians loot weapons from an army compound, a US officer said.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 03:42 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

A Weary Response to an Old Troll

In response to Mykeru's continued frothing rhetoric:

Now, I agree that the air-strike might not have been a great idea, PR-wise, but to call it a war crime is idiotic. Saddam Hussein is a valid strategic target, and while efforts should be made to limit collateral damage (as they were...please see the design specs of the GBU JDAM as well as the fact that the complex was mostly deserted,) Andy's right in that shielding oneself behind civilians places the blame for their deaths squarely on Saddam.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Tom at 02:19 PM | Comments (18) | TrackBack (0)

Daily stuff

Today's insights and whatever and whatnot:

That is all, now go enjoy the contest.

* That's a joke, ladies. Don't kill me. I love you. You're beautiful.

** I realize some readers may think work is a four-letter word and prefer longer words like "hand-out."

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Posted by Andy at 01:55 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

It's just a theory...wah wah wah

The Blount County, Tennessee Board of Education is joining the ranks of school boards that think they know more about a given subject than the educators themselves:

The Blount County Board of Education denied the adoption of three new biology textbooks because they teach evolution but do not cover creationism.
And this is a bad thing, because?

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 10:00 AM | Comments (28) | TrackBack (1)

Sir Robert?

Huh, who knew that Robert Mugabe, Zimbabwe's dictator-for-life, received an honorary knighthood from the Queen in 1994? Interesting - and even more interesting that the British government has resisted multi-party pressure to strip the title, saying:

Junior Foreign Office minister Lady Amos explained: "We may well re-visit this question in the future, but I think that there are other priorities right now."
Naturally, there are, but this is a man who is threatening the lives and livelihoods of British subjects and his own people - it might be a worthwhile gesture to spend 20 minutes stripping him of the knighthood, rather than continually humoring him like the French.
Liberal Democrat Lord Watson said: "Many people in this country will be deeply shocked and indeed offended that Mr Mugabe bears an honorary knighthood in this country."
As they should be.

Posted by Andy at 08:02 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

April 07, 2003

It's your move


BAGHDAD, Iraq, April 8 — A U.S. Air Force warplane dropped four enormous bombs Monday on a residential neighborhood where “extremely reliable” intelligence information indicated that Iraqi President Saddam Hussein and his two sons were staying, senior administration officials told NBC News. The sources would not rule out the possibility that Saddam could have moved before the planes struck, but they said it was highly likely that he and his sons were dead if they were still there when the bombs hit.
Naturally, certain elements will blast us for the need to target a residential area - and, naturally, they will fail to realize that the blame lies with the terrorist who hides behind his people. If any innocent lives were lost, let us hope that it was not in vain - and let us hope that the murdering Saddam, Uday, and Qasay are but smears in a crater.

Posted by Andy at 08:00 PM | Comments (34) | TrackBack (0)

Beyond the palace walls

Hey, wait, I thought Saddam Hussein's people were starving under the evil UN sanctions, but then I find this:

Dripping with dictator kitsch, Saddam Hussein's palace in Basra had everything a megalomaniac tyrant could wish for, from gold-plated lavatory brushes to French-made ornate lampposts entwined with climbing ivy.

There were Moorish screens carved from teak and giant marble-clad columns. There were vaulted ceilings and stained-glass windows. There was parquet flooring by the acre and sweeping staircases connecting ballroom to ballroom and a VHF radio system was fitted behind some of the panelling.

Wow, I wonder where the money for all that came from? Say, you don't think he diverted any funds from the oil-for-food program do you?

Nah, me either.

But I know Saddam wouldn't build a fancy palace out of ego and megalomania alone - surely he had grand plans for each one, perhaps allowing the poorest among Iraqis to live in opulent splendor even if only every third Tuesday:

It had a rather sad Mary Celeste air, with a filigree of desert dust covering the parquet floor, the gold lavatory fittings and every flat surface, which suggested that it had never actually been used.
OK, maybe not.

But don't worry - sanctions were working!

Posted by Andy at 06:56 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

When you put it like that

Wow, I'd like to live in a city with as cool a commercial district as this! Oh, wait, I do!

Although, I think it must have been a slow newsday if we're writing two-page long articles on Larimer Square. Sure, it's nice and all - the Market is a fine place to get a good lunch, Z Gallerie is a fine place to spend a lot of money on furniture that looks beautiful and was made by children in a foreign land - but I'm thinking someone in Denver paid for the plug.

Perhaps the crap photo they've used to accompany it is to even things out. Fair, balanced.

Posted by Andy at 06:50 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

What would Jesus do?

I'm fond of the phrase "lying for the Lord" - it's generally how I describe the actions of charlatans like Benny Hinn or the half-truths of people like James Dobson. This, however, beats all of them:

CAMP BUSHMASTER, Iraq - In this dry desert world near Najaf, where the Army V Corps combat support system sprawls across miles of scabrous dust, there's an oasis of sorts: a 500-gallon pool of pristine, cool water.

It belongs to Army chaplain Josh Llano of Houston, who sees the water shortage, which has kept thousands of filthy soldiers from bathing for weeks, as an opportunity.

''It's simple. They want water. I have it, as long as they agree to get baptized,'' he said.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 02:27 PM | Comments (10) | TrackBack (0)

A Contest

OK, since it's Monday (which has nothing to do with what I am about to write, but writing it makes this post look more substantial), let's have a caption contest for anyone so inclined.

Go here, see the pretty picture, make up a witty comment.

The winner will get something, or maybe nothing, but that uncertainty is what makes the game so enthralling.

Posted by Andy at 01:33 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (2)

* bang * (it's onomatopoeia day)

Have we found the...

Photo credit: ABC

Posted by Andy at 10:51 AM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (0)

* ding dong *

Who is it?

Avon calling.

Yes, I'm sure someone else has used that line already. Shut up.

Posted by Andy at 10:28 AM | Comments (13) | TrackBack (1)

Well, that's interesting...

I'm not sure what is more frightening: that someone went Googling for the phrase "Fibonacci sequence penis," or that the World Wide Rant is the number one hit for the search.

And to the devout searcher, don't worry, the Golden ratio has nothing to do with a golden shower. At least I hope it doesn't.

Posted by Andy at 10:09 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Free speech?

I'm not sure how I feel about this ruling from the Supreme Court:

WASHINGTON — A divided Supreme Court upheld a state ban on cross burning, ruling Monday that the history of racial intimidation attached to this symbol outweighs the free speech protection of Ku Klux Klansmen or others.
On one hand, I think if it is your cross on your property, then it's your right to do with it as you wish. On the other hand, a burning cross is easily interpreted as a threat of physical violence against a specific person or persons, which is and should be illegal.


Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 09:11 AM | Comments (13) | TrackBack (0)


Venomous Kate, in honor of the Iraqi regime, has given us a new drink recipe.

I'll stick with beer.

Posted by Andy at 08:43 AM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (1)

April 06, 2003

Weekend Recap

First, you have to see this. Stylin', indeed.

OK - it's winding down, been a non-stop, go-go-go, drink-drink-drink type of weekend here. A few meals out, a movie at home, a couple hours of trivia, and copious amounts of beer with our friends. I need a nap.

Or a beer.

Posted by Andy at 02:42 PM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (1)

April 04, 2003

Free at Last*

DNA evidence has freed a Massachusetts man who had spent 19 years in prison for a series of rapes he did not commit.

He's the seventh person in Massachusetts and 126th person in the country to be exonerated by post-conviction DNA testing, according to the Innocence Project, which spearheads such appeals, said Kaplan.

I wonder if Ann Coulter is stupid enough to hang onto this idiotic statement she made last year:

The odds of an innocent man being found guilty by a unanimous jury are basically nil.
I'm sure she is.

* In case you didn't know, Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated on this day in 1968.

Posted by Andy at 01:15 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Forgive them father, for they know not how to putt

(also can be found at Liquid Courage)

If you'll be traveling in the Southeast anytime soon, be sure to make Golgotha Fun Park your first destination.

Nothing says "FAMILY FUNTIME" like a mini-golf course named after the hill upon which Jesus was crucified.* Why, I bet while he was hanging up there, aside from being impressed by just how far he could see, he thought to himself:

"Good God Me, but this would be the perfect place for a goofy golf course."

Golgotha Fun Park - unintentional sacrilege like only a fundy can provide.

* Golgotha is the original Hebrew word from which we got our Latin-ized Calvary.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 09:24 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0)

Yep, they hate us

What else would compel an Iraqi man to do this, at risk to his own life and that of his loved ones?

The 32-year-old lawyer, identified only as Mohammed, told The Washington Post and USA Today that he peered through a window at the hospital where his wife worked as a nurse and saw a sight that "cut" his heart: Lynch being slapped in the face by the black-clad Iraqi security agent.

He said he decided on the spot he had to tell U.S. forces where to find the captured American private.

All well and good, but surely he doesn't like Americans in general.
"A person is a human being regardless of nationality," he told the Post. "Believe me, I love Americans."
Whoops, so I was wrong.

Posted by Andy at 07:40 AM | Comments (9) | TrackBack (0)

Two places at once

As you probably know, my guest blogging stint at got rave reviews in many big-name publications inside my deluded imagination. It seems as though Vicky has the same mental quirks and gets the same publications, because she's asked me to tend bar for the day over at the Liquid Courage Canteen.

So, I'll be posting here, there, but not everywhere. Just those two places. For now. My plans for world domination are progressing a bit more slowly than expected.

Anyway - perhaps Tom (who is on a one-post posting streak, go boy go) will help entertain you troops today here at the WWR. Place your bets!

And they're off...

Posted by Andy at 06:25 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

April 03, 2003

Germans are so f*cked up

...from today's "You Have GOT to be Kidding Me" file.

Posted by Tom at 11:24 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

Another reason to support the war

You know, I've been pretty hard on the anti-war protesters. Seriously, I'm not lying. But I don't feel so bad when all they give us is disruption and inconvenience and civil disobedience - and the pro-war side gives us this.

Why, hello...

Posted by Andy at 04:49 PM | Comments (21) | TrackBack (0)

Iran, Iran so far away...

Bad puns of 80s-songs aside, this doesn't look good.

WASHINGTON, April 3 (UPI) -- Iran's senior leadership decided last month to send irregular paramilitary units across their border with Iraq to harass American soldiers once Saddam Hussein's regime fell, according to U.S. intelligence reports.
At this rate, this war might turn into a two-for.

Posted by Andy at 04:17 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Ook ook

I like monkeys (and, honestly, who doesn't?) but this is a bit much.

Posted by Andy at 11:20 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Fair, Balanced - Part 2

Please, this is just stupid.

PORTLAND, Oregon (Reuters) - An Oregon anti-terrorism bill would jail street-blocking protesters for at least 25 years in a thinly veiled effort to discourage anti-war demonstrations, critics say.
Should they be arrested? Sure. Charged with some kind of misdemeanor? Yeah. Locked away for 25 years? Not at all - aside from the punishment not fitting the crime, I have no desire to support them with my taxes for a generation - do you?

Posted by Andy at 09:23 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0)

April 02, 2003

Happy Birthday to You...

Happy Birthday to You....
You're a Big Gay Screenwriting Nudist Type of Person,
Happy Birthday to You!

And Many More!

Yup, gotta keep up that Republican sheen for the most simple-minded amongst our viewers.

Posted by Andy at 11:46 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Get behind your team...

I think this is just what the Broncos, Avs, and Nuggets need. Indeed I do.

Gimme gimme more more more »

Posted by Andy at 02:55 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Note to Self

Early this morning, having showered and attempting to put on my anti-perspirant, the last remnants of the white stick o'no-sweat-goodness crumbled into tens of pieces and fell to the floor. Being far too lazy to go to the linen closet to get a new Container? What is it that deodorant comes in - besides a spray can?

Anyway - it's on the floor, I can't be bothered to get a fresh one from the linen closet down the hall, and so I grab the wife's anti-perspirant and use it. Not the best idea, as now I smell of lavender.

I feel pretty,
Oh so pretty
I feel pretty and witty and bright
And I pity
Any girl
Who isn't me tonight
Secret - strong enough for a man, but smells like a woman.

Posted by Andy at 02:25 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

And your point would be...?

In the continuing tradition of thinking that being outrageous and wacky will make people stop to reconsider their opinions (other than the one that says you are a nutter), a Frenchman had this idea:

PARIS (Reuters) - A self-styled Spiderman defied strong winds to scale a 47-storey Paris skyscraper without safety equipment on Tuesday to protest the war in Iraq.
Nothing says "Hey, America, think about the war - think about the reasons behind it - and think about the casualties!" like climbing up a building without a net. Oh wait, a lot of things do.

At least he didn't bother with blocking traffic, so that's a plus.

Polls show the French overwhelmingly oppose the U.S.-led war in Iraq.

Other polls also show that 2/3 of the French don't think they are on the same side as we are - and fully 1/3 hope we lose in Iraq. At this rate, Chrissie Hynde will be the next Jerry Lewis. And pictures show that the French are anti-American, anti-British, and anti-Semitic.

Hooray for the French.

Posted by Andy at 02:02 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

You can go home again

We hear a lot about Iraqis lining up in Jordan, Syria, and elsewhere, wanting to head back to fight the evil, imperialist American aggressors. Now we get to hear about those who want to go back to fight Saddam.

"I don't want American people to die for my country — I want me to be the first one," Alkased said. "I appreciate what American people are doing for my country, but I don't want them to spend their blood. I am ready to spend blood for my country."
Dave Alwatan needs no convincing.

"As an American Iraqi, all our people here want to go in the front of the American military to fight Saddam's regime," he said.

Alwatan's nephew has brain damage and facial scars after Iraqi soldiers kicked him in the face when he was a year old in order to get information during the first Gulf War. Alwatan said the military was searching for him and his brother.

"I want to fight Saddam's regime, not our people," he said. "Saddam will never, ever go away without fighting. We know that. Saddam, he must go very soon."

Of course, these Iraqi Americans have been tainted by the horrible afflictions of democracy and capitalism with which they might manage to infect their homeland.


Posted by Andy at 01:11 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Market News

The latest brokerage ratings have been released for World Wide Rant shares.

If this fine example of fabricated news doesn't inspire you to sink your play-money into this rising star and darling of tens of people, then nothing else will.

But you had better hurry as shares are running out fast (well, sort of fast - ok, maybe not so fast, but they might, so just to be safe, you should buy some - quickly! Go! Now!)

Rest assured that your cash infusion will be used to oppress the poor children of third world countries who transcribe our posts by hand for mere pennies a day, because that's what capitalists do. Bad capitalist pigs!


(BlogShares news idea shamelessly stolen from the lovely Vicky)

Posted by Andy at 10:55 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Unintended irony?

The University of Southern Mississippi's student newspaper, The Student Printz, has offered to host opinion columns on the the evolution vs. creationism slaughter debate. Having already carried a column in support of evolution, they now have printed one in support of creationism.

On. April. Fool's. Day.


Posted by Andy at 10:04 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Prison? Try an Institution.

Not content to simply believe in their own variety of angry sky god in the convent, three Catholic nuns went out for a walk:

Platte, and two other Dominican Sisters Carolyn Gilbert and Jackie Hudson, are on trial for alleged sabotage and malicious destruction of property related to an Oct. 6 break-in at the Minuteman III silo where they cut cables and made the sign of the cross on the silo lid with their own blood.
And why did they do this, you ask?
"We've all heard that there was a targeting of the people of Iraq who were threatened with mass murder by the use of nuclear weapons. All we could think of was the children and we had to do something," Platte told jurors in a courtroom packed with supporters.
Uh, I've not heard of targeting the Iraqi populace with nuclear weapons, have you? Are the voices talking to you again, Sister? There's just something not right about a bunch of women electing to live together in relative solitude.

Unless of course they are hot, enjoy jell-o wrestling and spankings, and have video cameras hooked to the Internet.

If convicted, the women face a prison sentence of up to 30 years and fines of up to $250,000.
It will be most interesting to see if their status as nuns gets them leniency - after all, they meant well with their destruction of government property and self-mutilation for the glory of God and the ChildrenTM.

Posted by Andy at 08:40 AM | Comments (15) | TrackBack (0)

April 01, 2003

Required Reading

As I'm not in much of a mood to post today, and the news isn't giving me a lot to work with that hasn't been said better and more often elsewhere, I'll simply send you over to read what Lesley has to say about the Bush / Hitler comparison idiocy we sometimes hear.

Posted by Andy at 01:46 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)