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September 09, 2006

Into Darkest Stupid

Sometimes I feel like a blogospheric Steve Irwin, boldly wading into swamps of irrationality and general idiocy, all in the pursuit of grabbing a wingnut or moonbat by their flailing little legs and holding them up for all of you to see, and point at, and laugh at... lots.

Thankfully, idiots online don't have barbed tails with which to strike, their means of attack reduced to pretty colors dancing on my screen. This doesn't make them ultimately less dangerous though, because the world is full of stupid people, willing to turn off independent thought in favor of party-line voting and mental goosestepping behind the Ann Coulters and Michael Moores of the world.

But, I do it for you, good people. I risk my own sanity, trekking through brambles of bullshit and forests of fearful fulmination, all so we can giggle and say,"There but for the grace of evolution and genes whose phenotypical expression was a fully-working brain, go I."

Today's example is one EricPWJohnson, frequent commenter at RightwingSparkle*. Marvel as, in the comments to this post, he responds to me by making up strawman arguments and demonstrates a remarkable ability to not understand basic English.

Perhaps the "PW" is for Punjab Washabi, English being his second language - thus, misunderstandings not unexpected - and "Eric Johnson" being the name of the vacationing college student that once visited India and sired him to a New Delhi sweatshop girl. Or, perhaps he's just kind of dumb. I'm voting for "dumb," and willfully so.

Fresh off of that, EricPWJohnson sees a shiny object elsewhere, makes assorted "ook ook ook" sounds with glee, and promptly shows up in the comments to this post to repeat his made-up arguments and also insist that there's an East/West Coast conspiracy of liberals to go online and demoralize conservative bloggers.

I'm sorry, but I thought it was the moonbats that wore the tinfoil hats. Apparently that fashion tip has crossed the political aisle. Besides, how the heck would a bunch of liberals demoralize conservatives? Tell them that the God doesn't exist and that, right now, somewhere in America, an unmarried couple is doing it doggy-style?

EricPWJohnsonSt.John-Smythe IV, you're a special brand of stupid crazy. To you, I raise my glass (or will, as it's only 7:14am, a couple hours too early for a beer).

Update: EricPunjabi is now engaging in what I will call "argumentum-ad-blog-populum." That is, since RWS has more commenters, my opinion means nothing. By this (par for the course) idiotic reasoning, Eric has just said that DailyKos is a beacon of reasoned argumentation and discourse. Yet another sign that Eric just isn't a very smart man, although he apparently dry humps logical fallacies at every opportunity. Squeech squeech squeech squeech.

* Why do I go there? I don't know. Why do people slow down to look at traffic accidents? Why do birds suddenly appear, every time you are near? Why do stars fall down from the sky, every time you walk by?

Posted by Andy at 08:15 AM





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