July 31, 2006

What's your funniest made-up joke?

I'm not asking for a good joke you've read or heard. Instead, tell me what's the funniest thing you've ever come up with on the spot that made a lot of people crack up. Here's one of my own. (Your mileage my vary so if you feel compelled to comment rudely, realize I now have the power to edit comments...I think.)

A little necessary background first. For those of you who don't know, I'm 90-95% deaf in both ears. Some powerful hearing aids do a nice job of providing loudness but clarity is severely lacking. That's why I still have to rely a great deal on lip-reading when engaging someone in a conversation.

Anyway, a bunch of buddies and I rented a van one night to go bar-hopping and I was sitting in the front seat. Everyone was pretty hyper but since it was dark and not being able to see their lips, I couldn't understand a word. At one point, the driver motioned to me that someone in the back seat was trying to get my attention.

I then turned around and said, "Guys, would ya'll please not f'ing talk to me right now. I can't hear in the dark!"

There you have it...