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The FBI is warning police nationwide to be alert for people carrying almanacs, cautioning that the popular reference books covering everything from abbreviations to weather trends could be used for terrorist planning.Next week's memo will probably encourage law enforcement to look for anyone who might have access to the internet, or perhaps a set of encyclopedias that aren't covered in an inch of dust. Also, be on the lookout for tourists with local guide books. Might as well arrest local guidepeople while we're at it. Heck, anybody taking pictures of a landmark is probably guilty of something (beyond wearing shorts with knee-high, black socks and tennis shoes).
If this is what passes for Homeland Security, we're screwed.
Update: Al Qaeda, having apparently scanned the shelves of their local Al-Blockbuster for crappy infidel movies, are now targeting ocean liners. Thankfully, Tom Ridge is calling Jason Patric and Sandra Bullock back to active duty.
Should they fail in their mission to stop the Islamofascists, be prepared to watch the most boring terrorist attack in history unfold repeatedly on network television.
