Things to Do Before I Die

1. Swallow a live bunny brandishing a barbed wire whip.

2. Be molested by a brazen and sassy camel with a lisp.

3. Go on a cruise with the idiots and readers of the National Review.

Truth be told, I’m looking forward to numbers one and two more than number three.

Alongside #3, I’d probably also rank a medicinal cruise to Cuba with Michael Moore.

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