Archive for March, 2007

Blaming the Victim

Saturday, March 24th, 2007

…Denver, Colorado police department style:

A carjacking suspect fled the scene on foot after being shot in the head by his victim and crashing the stolen car he was driving.

Police say the victim was still in his white car when it was stolen and he managed to pull out a gun and shoot the suspect in the head.

Police are trying to determine if the suspect and the victim knew each other and how the victim had a gun.

My guess is that he got it because of that pesky Second Amendment that Denver likes to pretend does not exist.

I’m surprised Publicola isn’t all over this like white on rice (and, so as not to offend: black on black beans, yellow on saffron, red on tomatoes, and brown on gravy).

And Suddenly, I’m Catholic Again

Friday, March 23rd, 2007

You know, having two kids is great. They can entertain one another, learn from each other, and enjoy that wonderful bond that siblings develop once they stop annoying the hell out of each other.

And, besides, two is a nice round number.

Here’s hoping that three is more rounderer. Kind of like Mrs. WWR’s burgeoning belly.

Yikes.

A Missed Milestone

Friday, March 23rd, 2007

Huh, looks like I missed the fifth blogiversary of my own site.

It was March 19.

That’s 35 in dog years, and Charles Nelson Reilly in monkey years.

Creationist Nonsense

Friday, March 23rd, 2007

…in my own back yard.

Some commenters wondered if the Ken Poppe mentioned in the previous story was the same Ken Poppe who wrote a creationist book, Reclaiming Science from Darwinism. Yes, it is. He’s at Trail Ridge Middle School, a public school in Longmont, CO, and is listed as teaching 6th grade science. He freely admits to teaching creationist crap to his class, and says that the book grew out of his lessons.

Yay. Hooray.

It also appears the so-called “science teacher” is commenting over at Pharyngula (linked above), striving toward martyrdom for himself in the name of lying for his mythical lord. I’ve no idea if it’s truly him, of course. I suspect he dabbles in chemistry in class too; it’s a shame that self-immolation seems to be reserved for crazy Buddhists*.

* Just kidding. I certainly wish no ill upon the man, just good sense and rational thinking. But then there’s that wish in one hand and poop in the other thing.

American Idol Recap, March 20

Tuesday, March 20th, 2007

Wow, Sanjaya really needs to get back to being a teenager, and cease impersonating a suck-ass singer.

Update: Really, he does.

Update: No, I mean it.

Dunkin Donuts: Free Iced Coffee Day

Tuesday, March 20th, 2007

It’s tomorrow, March 21, if you like that sort of thing.

Personally, I rank it right up there with non-alcoholic beer, or – say – the way the Finns will put fried egg and pineapple on their hamburgers. In short: that just ain’t right, y’all.

I do dig me some donuts though.

Mmmm, donuts.

Wake me on free donut day.

The Audacity of Caruso, Part II

Sunday, March 18th, 2007

This post is for reader and sometimes-guest-blogger Blake, who lays claim to a deep hatred of all things David Caruso (he of CSI: Miami fame).

The video below should serve to stoke the fires of that disdain, or perhaps Blake’s sleep will instead forever be haunted by Caruso’s sunglasses spouting off ridiculous one-liners (wait, sorry, “acting”).




You’re welcome.

Hey, don’t thank me; thank Goldberg.

Update: As requested by Blake via e-mail, Jim Carrey doing David Caruso on Letterman.


On Top of the World? Not So Much.

Sunday, March 18th, 2007

I’m sorry, someone help me out here, but what the hell has happened to Eddie Van Halen?

Yikes. He looks like a crazy homeless person in that photo.

Here’s hoping he gets the help he needs.

Update: What is wrong with this story?

Following their acceptance speech and a Van Halen-tribute performance by Velvet Revolver, Hagar and Anthony joined the house band–led by Paul Shaffer–for a rendition of the Hagar-era Van Halen hit “Why Can’t This Be Love.”

I’m not sure which is worse: Velvet Revolver or Paul Shaffer jamming with Van Halen members. This reminds me of how I knew I was getting old when VH-1 started playing old Metallica rather than, say, Rick Astley.

Happy Car, Happy Car!

Sunday, March 18th, 2007

How you do make your 2006 Ford Fusion happy?

You take it for a detailing, given that it has spent the last year with only moderately successful washes and nary a bit of cleaning on the inside.

This morning we spent some quality time at The Wave here in the Denver metro area.

Until today, I’d never had my car detailed. Always saw it as a waste of money. I was, once upon a long ago, more than willing to spend six hours in the driveway washing, waxing, and cleaning my car. Yes, I’m the guy that would apply swirl remover, polish, and then wax to his automobile, ensuring it looked AWESOME until the first rain.

So, I opted for a $100 mini-detail, getting it a thorough cleaning inside and out, and it’s like having a new car again (if you ignore the fuel line rattle behind the dash at 1500RPM but I plan to have that remedied soon). She’s shiny on the outside, and they were even able to rescue a lot of shine on the chrome grille that Colorado’s mag chloride had damaged (thanks, CDOT!). The inside is spotless and conditioned and lovely, as if my two children were naught but daydreams that never stepped foot into the Fusion.

On the autometaphysical side, I think a clean car just drives happier than a dirty car. They know, honest, they do. Be good to your car, lest we all end up like Maximum Overdrive (which is not to say we’ll all end up as really shitty movies, but victims of our vehicles).

A Gathering of the Gullible

Sunday, March 18th, 2007

Hey, if any you are (a) in Las Vegas and (b) available to have your intelligence insulted for four days, might I suggest you attend the I Can Do It! conference in Las Vegas?

Welcome to the Fourth Annual I Can Do It! Conference, sponsored by Hay House. This event is designed to support you on your journey to new levels of personal growth.

And might I suggest you report back to those of us choosing to live in the rational world?

Hey, really, I’m all about personal growth. Love the stuff. I just happen to think it takes focus and effort to achieve one’s dreams, and – given that the universe doesn’t much care for us one way or the other – not all of us will get there. In fact, some of us will fail miserably. However, it’s still worth trying to get what we want out of life, because to not do so is a guarantee of failure.

I’m sure that within the speakers and presenters of this conference, there will be people who feel the same way. They will espouse the value of envisioning your future, developing a plan to get there, and keeping at it until you have what you want, adjusting course as life throws you curve balls. Fantastic and spot on.

That said, when a conference such as this hosts obvious frauds and hucksters like Sylvia Browne and Deepak Chopra as keynote speakers, well – caveat emptor and P.T. Barnum is tap-dancing in the afterlife.

At this point, we should cue Jerry Lee or Elvis to sing “Whole Lotta Stupid Goin On.”

Maybe I should just look at this as scam artists like Sylvia Browne and Deepak Chopra fulfilling their personal dreams: they wanted to get rich, and they did, but only by lying to the stupid, the ignorant, and the voraciously gullible.

Once again, why must my sense of ethics get in the way of pillaging the pockets of the perpetually pinheaded?